


Punishment

by inkedauthority



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Curse AU, F/F, Romantic Snow Queen, Snow Queen - Freeform, mommy!regina, mommy!snow, multi-chapter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-05
Updated: 2018-05-23
Packaged: 2018-05-24 21:51:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 35,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6167959
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inkedauthority/pseuds/inkedauthority
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Romantic Snow/Regina AU; She woke up with the feeling of victory in her bones, only to have it shatter before her eyes when the image of Snow White swam before it, making grand accusations of being her wife and perhaps the curse was supposed to be her happy ending, but this certainly felt like a punishment to her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The awakening

PROLOGUE: THE AWAKENING

 

* * *

 

SHE HAD MORPHED into something else entirely. Ever changing as the days went on, vials being read and ingredients being gathered, and everything seemed in utter disarray _except_ her. Sure her hair was matted and clothes dirty but the smile on her face, although maniacal was one of victory she could practically taste if she did it right; and boy oh _boy_ did she manage to achieve those last delicious moments that had her chuckling within the dark swirl of broken glass and deep purple magic, sweeping her away to a land that had her happy ending waiting for her on a silver platter.

 

It was a blinding spell, one that had her wake with a start, a small gasp escaping her lips when a shiver of unfamiliarity shot through her consciousness like a child being watched from afar with bad intentions. It was immediate, and for that she was eternally grateful, for her skin was not pierced with glass and her lips were not hurting from smiling so much, even if she had began the process of gloating that had everything hurt so _good_ like a sore body after a night of passionate love-making; speaking of love making, the queen was eager to explore her relationship with the huntsman who had begrudgingly become her pet in the last few years. This new land no doubt held a few secrets to shaking up the bedroom activities with a few twists of its own.

 

Stretching like a cat, Regina purred at her thoughts and pushed her white bedding aside, a stark contrast to her black fur lined duvets and hand stitched sheets in the land she wished to never return to, but her moment of victory was only short lived, destined to be shaken with a sight that had the queen’s eyes widen in surprise and shock, two emotions that had her guard up in defence like she had learned a long time ago around the mother whose surprises involved marriages to kings who were looking for baby sitters, and a up close and personal show of her fiancé being killed right before her very eyes in a gesture of _love_ no less, but this— _this_ was on a whole new level that had her gut twisting in knots.

 

“ _Hmm_ morning,” came the sleep mumbled reply of the one woman who Regina had set out cursing realms for. “Come back to bed, its too early.” a hand guided Regina back down, her back stiff and rigid, eyes wide and calculating every move the other woman made, trying to decipher if this was some trick, if the curse had backfired and she had fallen into the sleep she had put so many others in. This did feel odd, _yes_ , but she was sure a place filled with her own regrets would not be so smooth and lov—

 

Regina’s eyes widened even further, a gasp escaping her lips with the rush of shock she felt at the smooth chuckle against her neck, a soft breath making her close her eyes and turn away because the entire ordeal was too much for her brain to comprehend, too much for her to push the former Snow White away and say _enough!_ But if this was the curse, then she didn’t want to disrupt it, didn’t want to see what her retaliation to this entire thing might do, so she lay still, looking up at the ceiling and hoping that whatever Snow had in mind wouldn’t be dragging the quee— _mayor_ down to her cupboard to showcase her ribbons and tiara’s until Regina excused herself with a headache, because smiling at her stepdaughter over such trivial things was beginning to ache in her soul for being reduced to a sick doll that was used as a tool to entertain the princess, but instead, all Snow did was rest against her, one hand thrown over her waist in a show of affectionate cuddling she often had to endure during her time with the young princess when Leopold headed out to motivate the battle troupes against the ogres in the North for days at a time; still Regina didn’t relent her stiffness and apparently the now short haired bandit noticed with a confused expression on her face that had her look up into Regina’s eyes and frown.

 

“What’s wrong?’ she asked softly, so soft Regina had to strain to listen and then a hand stroked her face, a tender caress that had her even _more_ confused. Since when did Snow White become so affectionate towards the evil queen? Was this the curse? Was this her hopes and dreams? Were they, as she had once told Snow in the forest when she was disguised as Wilma, a family now? Just the two of them stepmother and daughter, a familial love flowing between them as easily as before without Leopold to cast his shadow on the affection she had for the child because he reminded her of the love she had lost to wed him?

 

“What are you doing here?” Regina asked instead, the bite from her voice evident, but not harsh as she gazed into the forest green eyes that had her jerk back at the hurt she found there. It was unnerving, undeserving to have Snow look at her like that, like she had killed one of the dwarves for fun and had her watch, but instead the hurt that Regina had for a few seconds relished in, turned into a soft expression that had Snow sigh and pull herself up into a sitting position, stretch as if this was the bed she slept in every night and glance back at the Mayor with a small roll of her eyes. The action made Regina spur to life, pulling her out of the daze she was in and the fear that had gripped her heart at destroying something she may have found again, and instead let herself ease out of bed with a glare at the woman, ready to snap at the old Snow White for being so stupidly brave as to enter the lion’s cave, when her mouth was pressed quite possessively to the nemesis she had tried to kill for years on end.

 

“I know you’re angry.” Snow whispered, “ _but,_ ” her forefinger rested on Regina’s lips, keeping the stunned queen silent for a few seconds longer while she continued to unravel the workings of the curse to the caster herself, “I wanted to come home, I was missing you and I’m perfectly healthy… a little sore _yes_ , but I’m sure, with you by my side I can manage anything, even your anger _Madame mayor._ ” A childlike giggle came from Snow’s mouth, making her shoulder’s shake with the humour she found while her lips pressed against full ones again, earning a gasp that was obviously misinterpreted.

 

Regina’s mind raced, hands balled up into fists and eyes remained wide open until she moved back so quickly, the woman kneeling at the edge of the bed tumbled forwards for a few seconds until she caught the headboard to steady herself. “No,” the Mayor seethed, wagging her finger at Snow, trying to get her bearings, to formulate an appropriate reason for all this **mess** because surely the curse wouldn’t make Snow White show up in her bed, kissing her of all things just like…

 

She took a deep breath, rubbing her temples with her fingers while breathing in and out steadily. Snow had kissed her before, that she remembered but it was so long ago that the memory had seemingly faded from her mind until now. She didn’t understand the workings of this new arrangement, but what she _could_ understand was the feeling of a stinging pain that had her open her eyes in fury. “What do you think you’re doing?” the words came out biting, each syllable enunciated with care, making the smaller woman shrink back in a silent anger that amused the queen, and if she were not so damn confused she would have laughed at the sight of Snow White hugging a pillow to her chest and pouting like a guilty child trying not to look as if the missing pillow on the bed was tossed at the other brunette by her.

 

 “You’re acting strange Regina!” although her words were clearly meant to be a yell, they came out as an angry whisper instead, earning her an eyebrow raise that was rewarded with a huff. Snow’s left hand was raised then, showing off a band Regina had never seen before. The queen was sure Charming had gifted her a _hand-me-down_ ring with the smallest emerald she had ever seen, but on that pesky ring finger was a beautiful princess cut diamond set in a silver band that had all the makings of a true royal wedding ring, one that had her step back in absolute fear of it. “ **This,** ” Snow started, making Regina step back a foot further, reaching behind her to flick her wrist out of sight, have Snow off guard, kill her with a flick of a wrist, a fireball, _anything_ , but nothing came, giving her the harsh reminder of the land she had cursed them to. “This ring is the symbol of our love, of our commitment and I know you’re angry, I do… but _please_ Regina, I want to be here, not because I know how tired you have been going from the hospital to work and back again, but because… because I _love_ you and I know how much you wanted this.” The former bandit took a step forwards, taking Regina’s fearful expression as a display of love that the queen didn’t feel and cupped Regina’s face with both hands after ungracefully tumbling out of bed in a haste to get to her wife. “I’m home now and I’m safe and you have a few days of leave, why don’t you take today off and we can get properly settled in, after all I don’t think the doctor permitted me to do any heavy lifting yet. I’m still healing.” a soft smile graced Snow’s lips and Regina dodged her kiss by turning her head to the side, letting her cheek take the brunt of the affection that seemed to resonate with the now pixie haired woman she was sure she cursed into becoming a meek school teacher, but this person was nothing like that.

 

“Healing from what?” The mayor couldn’t help but ask the question, letting her childhood curiosity take over her need to strangle Snow where she stood for the sake of her sanity, let alone her entire life because that ring apparently— she had one too— made her _married_ to her enemy, bound by law and _God_ (if she stopped to believe in such a thing), although the entire ridiculousness of the notion had her take in deep breaths in order not to faint in front of the woman she still wanted to impress with her outer cool exterior, whether it be lighting a fireball, seducing a boy who danced with her at the ball or feeding her a poisoned apple with a clever twist. It was all too much for the woman to handle, too much to take in in one go and _why_ did this happen? Why was her head swimming? Why was there this _sound_? This irritating sound she seemed to want to respond to without her permission?

 

“I’m not playing this game with you Regina, you know for eight months I was pregnant with our child, you were the one who wanted one so badly… it’s not my fault she decided to come a little early or that I just wanted to come **home** , honestly how much longer did you expect me to subject our child to tubes she did not need? Emma is perfectly healthy, there is nothing to be worried about. Now I’m going to feed her and I could use a cup of coffee afterward.” Pressing a kiss to Regina’s cheek, Snow ran her hand up and down the mayor’s arm before disappearing down the corridor to sooth the wailing child.

 

Regina just stood there, mouth hanging open and brain racing to process this new information. “I’m married to _Snow White_ , with a _child_ … in a curse I designed for _my_ happy ending. Oh gods this is a nightmare.” If she were being honest with herself, Regina would have thought this to be a deserving punishment for all her sins, but surely burning in a pit of fire would have been a much better option than **this** of all things!

 

The entirety of the situation hadn’t fully hit the former queen, after all she wasn’t a morning person, but by the time she realised that whatever had happened was certainly not a dream, thanks to a few pinches on the arm, Regina had showered so quickly she forgot to take the time to appreciate that she knew how to use it and dressed in the most ridiculous of outfits with the least amount of fabric she had encountered in all her years, before tugging on the short dress and fleeing out the door with too red lipstick and too high heels practically running (as best as she could) to the one person who could help sort all this mess out : _Rumpelstiltskin._

 


	2. Memory Loss

CHAPTER 1: MEMORY LOSS

 

* * *

 

 

THE TINY BELL above Mr Gold’s door jingled with such cheeriness she had half the mind to stand on her tip toes and rip the blasted thing off, but before she had any more murderous thoughts, the man she was looking for slinked in with a smug look that only said he knew she would come to him, whether it be one day or the other. “What the hell?!” she yelled, slamming her hands on the glass counter, watching as the man’s beady eyes widened just slightly at the fact that it could crack if she kept that up.

 

“I can assure you Madame Mayor, I have no idea what you’re talking about, but before I forget my manners, Good morning to you too.” A tip of his cane and a small knowing smile later, Regina had launched herself across the counter to grab at the lapel of his jacket. “Why is she in my bed? Claiming to be _married_ to me?” The words were but a warning hiss, one he should have heeded, but instead the slimy man chuckled, brushing the offending hand off him in order to walk across the shop unrestrained. Regina’s eyes never left him, watching every single move he made, because all _this_ had to be his fault, it was his curse after all and if she thought about it, then he was the very person who convinced her that she should go ahead with the plan to take everyone to a world that would guarantee her happy ending, but apparently, it looked more like he had secured something he wanted at the expense of her reward.

 

“You mean the woman you have been married to for…” he trailed off, a thoughtful expression on his face as he tried to remember the exact year the Mayor had announced her devotion to the school teacher. They were an unlikely pair, everyone had blatantly commented on that, but it seemed that they both were happy until _now_ of course. “…As long as I can remember,” he finished lamely, shrugging his shoulders as if it were normal to forget such a thing, but I hear baby Emma is doing rather well, you should be happy Madame Mayor, your wife and child are back home.” Regina seethed at the tone the imp had, like he knew something more but refused to say it, and where on earth did that child come from?

 

“Listen here you bastard, I never asked for all of this, you promised me my happy ending only to tie me to my enemy with a child that is not mine, you better fix this.” She hoped the threat would make him speak, but Regina had never intimidated Rumple and apparently she had no effect on this Gold either. “I don’t know what the problem is Madame Mayor, you seemed happy, but if it is a divorce you require, I can try and pull a few strings for you regarding the paperwork, but if it is something else you need, I’m afraid I do not have the same qualifications as Dr Hopper— who is down the road.” He pointed his finger in the general direction of where she assumed the psychologist’s office was, but Jiminy Cricket didn’t hold the answers, _Rumplestiltskin_ did, someone her nightmare had turned into a mindless fool that messed with the curse before handing over his memories in a show of gratitude over something she hadn’t bothered to find out about; and the fact that she was now alone in this godforsaken town with a punishment she did not deserve had her almost take up the offer Gold was offering if not for a small reprieve from the enemy she spent too many years trying to kill.

 

“You really don’t remember?” she asked, tugging on the coat she pulled over her frame before leaving the too white house. “Remember what exactly?” And that statement had her slump her shoulders in defeat because there was no _dearie_ at the end of that sentence, no malicious glint in his eye, just the usual confusion she had seen on Snow’s face this morning when apparently _she_ was the one now acting different.

 

Shaking her head with a disbelieving grunt, Regina looked the man up and down before deciding that this entire conversation was useless. He didn’t know a thing besides the memories the curse had given him, memories that held the information about her relationship with the bandit she had never seen in any other light other than annoyingly bratty, let alone _romantic_. “Say…” she drawled, turning to face him once again, remembering that she had one ace up her sleeve that slept underneath the hospital, ready to be used to her advantage should anything happen and she needed Rumple’s help. “You didn’t flinch when I said Emma was not mine, what do you know?” She watched as he laughed throatily, leaning heavily on his cane as he looked at her with mirth swimming in his eyes, “If you cannot remember may I suggest Dr Whale instead of Dr Hopper.”

 

“I don’t have time for your games, just tell me what I need to know or in the next edition of the mirror all your… _activities_ will be well known to the public and we both know that the denizens of this town need only one leader to riot against the other.” leaning forwards in a show of power and what she hoped was a threatening move, she watched as Gold’s face morphed into a grimace instead of a smile. “Fine, but I still think that your lack of memory needs to be visited by someone a little more qualified Madame Mayor.” the short but useful man set his cane aside in favour of grabbing a rag to wipe down the already immaculate counters, showing his utter disinterest in the topic of the Mayor’s love life. “You married Miss Blanchard and then I don’t know what you did in your free time after that because honestly its none of my business,” Regina winced at the blow to the sex life she didn’t want to know about, “and then you had a baby, now I would love to explain how the bees and birds work, but as you are well aware it doesn’t relate to _your_ epic tale of love.” She was sure she saw a smirk there somewhere, but as she had already decided, this man didn’t have the workings of the dark one, he was just a lowly shop keeper.

 

“Get to the point Gold,” the Mayor snapped, rolling her eyes at his antics, only for him to look up at her with a slight raise of his eyebrows. “You opted for an alternative method of producing a child and from what Miss Blanchard had told me on numerous occasions when I quite honestly didn’t need to know, was that a John Doe happened to be the sperm donor of your child, so yes, Emma is not yours by blood at least.” Regina perked up at the new information, knowing that she needed to see this John Doe. She was sure she put Charming in a coma (with the same suspicious identity), but with the recent work of the curse, she had no idea what else had changed and if Emma was Charming’s daughter… then that only meant that the saviour who could unravel her curse was now living in her house as _her_ child.

 

“Satisfied Madame Mayor?” The shop keeper asked, jarring the brunette from her thoughts long enough to offer Gold a tight lipped smile and turn on her heel, the hospital her next destination.

 

Gold’s answers weren’t enough, it didn’t answer why the curse had put her in such a situation or why she had to be married to Snow White instead of being roommates with her or something less _vulgar._ She would have even taken been married to Graham better than this, but she supposed that the entire ordeal was just a way to get her to redeem herself with all the bad karma she had created.

 

Her steps were heavy and sure, her heels clicking against the pavement as the thoughts of her new life and what she had gathered about it swirling around in her overloaded brain, when she collided quite painfully into someone. “Watch where you’re going!” the Mayor snapped, standing up to her full height, ready for a fight if it came down to that, but instead she felt a tender touch to her arm and then found concerned green eyes that asked too many questions she didn’t know the answer to. “Regina?” Snow asked— _no_ , Mary Margaret, one long name for such a small person that obviously did all this to hurt her in some way. She and Rumple must have gotten together made some deal to ruin her life, take her promised happy ending and beat her with the whip of fate until she cried mercy and begged for no more. “Regina look at me, I think you’re running a fever”

 

“That is my blood pressure rising, not a fever.” Shaking the hand from her forehead away, Regina sidestepped the stroller with a sleeping child in it and headed down the road to confront a man in a coma about a baby that wasn’t hers, because all this was getting entirely out of hand and why couldn’t she breathe anymore? Was her chest supposed to hurt this much? “Regina!” She was sure she swayed on her feet a little, but it didn’t matter, she had a mission and her happy ending was going to come to her whether she forced its hand or not.

 

She could see the pavement rising towards her, but before she could kiss it, a hand steadied her from the side, holding her up as best it could while she swatted at the offending limb aimlessly. “No, let go!” She protested weakly, pushing at Mary Margaret’s body, gasping for air because the scent of the enchanted forest still clung to Snow’s skin, the reminder of who she was and what she had done hanging around them like death even if the woman who now looked at her with worry was not who Regina had gone about trying to murder for the better part of ten years.

 

“Regina, I think you’re sick. I knew something was wrong when you went out so suddenly without saying goodbye and then you didn’t show up for breakfast at Granny’s.” The teacher was muttering more to herself than anyone else and Regina found she didn’t mind the fact that she wasn’t expected to be listening to that whiny voice, especially since she was so used to drowning it out over so many years, anything Snow said would have been automatically filtered for her brain to register something crass and demeaning against the princess that usually went along the line’s of _I’m an idiotic spoiled princess, a_ nd her favourite, _Regina is better and prettier than me._

 “Okay,” Mary Margaret drawled, pulling Regina closer to her while reaching behind her to grab the handles of the stroller, pushing it in front of them as they walked down the street, “I’m taking you to the hospital and you have no say in the matter.” Regina walked with her supposed _family_ on wobbly legs, not liking this close contact one bit, but if it got her to the place she needed to be, then perhaps she could get a nice dose of pain medication for her headache and interrogate this John Doe, then _maybe_ kill a baby if it happened to be his.

 

The hospital came up just after they passed Grannys Inn which wasn’t too far from where she had found Snow, and when the woman released her in favour of some other nameless staff helping her, Regina didn’t know if she wanted to cling to the woman the curse married her to for the sake of her dignity, or sigh in relief from being away from her even if it was for a few minutes. Deciding on the latter, the Mayor let her powerful personality fall when she collapsed into the arms of some strong young man she might had threatened back in the enchanted forest for one reason or the other, and only hoped that Dr Whale didn’t say her lack of a healthy breakfast that morning had been the cause of her loss of consciousness, when obviously it was so _much more_ than that.

 


	3. Blurry eyed

CHAPTER 2: BLURRY EYED

 

* * *

 

 

She was sure everything was just a bad dream she would wake up from, or perhaps it started off as a lovely escape only to twist and morph into something else as dreams often did and for a moment, Regina expected to awake in her bed chambers, handmaiden’s pulling at the heavy curtains to let light in while she struggled to get up as she usually did, until a promise of _maybe_ grabbing Snow White’s heart if she rose early had her jerk away from the warm comfort of her bed and into the bath, where she dressed herself in her usual armour of sarcasm and elaborate makeup that hid most of her life’s horrors from those who knew nothing about the little girl who had hope that had long been buried beneath hatred and revenge. Instead, Regina found herself staring at a too white ceiling, beeping coming from somewhere far away, and a heavy weight on her arm that seemed to shift every few seconds.

 

Blinking again to clear the blur in her vision, Regina looked down at her form to the white sheet that covered her, and down to the end of the single bed that cut off too soon to be anything other than a commercialised bed that was made to utilise as much space in a small confinement as possible. _“Where?”_ she croaked, swallowing thickly, trying to rid her throat of the dryness it now held. Her voice seemed to have alerted the weight on her arm about her wakefulness, because the next thing she saw was a woman bolt out of the room and yell at a few people, worry, concern and joy all blended into one as Mary Margaret bounced around the room between the sleeping baby in her carrier seat and Regina who grimaced every time she was asked if she was okay.

 

Regina was not okay, she was _far_ from it and if her mouth didn’t feel like it was glued together then she would have said as much with the usual bite in her tone over the unwelcomed concern for her health, but the absence of her protests only gave Mary Margaret an opportunity to smooth her hair and kiss her cheek, whispering words of worry and encouragement that was _really_ not needed— but she did help Regina up into a comfortable sitting position, fluffing her pillows and the like, which the Mayor didn’t groan about, and _that_ seemed to please her cursed wife, who _again_ thought it invitation to smother her.

 

She quickly grew tired of having to jerk away from Mary Margaret’s touch every few seconds and finally, much like a grumpy cat, she had succumbed to the soft petting she didn’t want. “Oh Regina, you had us so worried,” Mary Margaret whispered to her, earning an eye roll in response to her pretentious behaviour, or maybe this was how Snow was all the time and Regina, while busy trying to kill her, had only seen the warrior instead of the caring _annoying_ person she really was underneath all that fire. “Why?” Regina wheezed out, holding a hand to her throat when the dryness of it became too much for her to handle. Getting the hint, Mary Margaret flew from one end of the room to the other so fast it made Regina’s head spin and pressed a disgusting plastic cup to her lips that she at first refused, because what if the thing was **poisoned?!** But after the first drop of water hit her protesting lips, she gulped the liquid with as much enthusiasm as a man walking the desert for years. If the liquid was poisoned, then at least she would be free from the wretched nightmare that seemed to plague her every time she opened her eyes expecting something other than the world she had created, but alas her punishment remained and Regina could protest only so much to Snow’s affections until the doctor came in with a smug look that told her all she needed to know about the paper gown she wore instead of her usual too short clothing.

 

“Well Madame Mayor, you gave us quite the scare,” Whale reported, looking at the chart he unclicked from the edge of the bed and unknowingly giving Snow reason to nod her head like a dog in agreement and squeeze her hand like she was giving birth all over again. “You were out of it for quite a few hours, only managed to get you back after giving you fluids you didn’t have and almost considered a feeding tube, but luckily you woke up before we could do anything more.” Regina frowned at his words, wondering what the hell all those things were until the curse supplied her with the information she needed to know about a tube being stuck down her nasal passage so that she could be force fed. The thought alone made her shudder in disgust, thankful she didn’t have to wake up with something so far down her throat that what little voice she had left wouldn’t be able to work. “Why?” she asked again, pulling her hand from Mary Margaret’s grasp, an annoyed expression crossing her face even if she kept her eyes on Whale, “I’m _fine_ , I just got a little dizzy, nothing to fuss about.” Shrugging at her condition, she watched as the Doctor’s eyebrow inched up his forehead in a mocking expression she wished she had the energy to rip off.

 

“When last did you eat Regina?” He asked, setting the clipboard back down to cross his hands over his chest, looking every much the man he pretended to be when she scoffed at the question, trying to remember when was the last time she had put a morsel in her mouth, wine, _yes_ , but food? Perhaps the occasional grape, but other than that she had been so focused on the curse, nothing else mattered and looking back on it now the curse hadn’t changed the physicality of anyone, simply their memories.

 

Snow still had her baby tummy, big breasts Regina was slightly jealous about, and a glow about her that would most likely fade as the years went, but Regina? She had come into the curse starved and dehydrated, possibly _drunk_ which would explain the entire nightmare so maybe fainting was not a bad thing, but that hand was on hers again, squeezing painfully tight to pull the information out of her because she hadn’t answered the question yet. “I don’t know,” she answered honestly, looking down like a scolded child, knowing that if she had her father with her still, he would have had the same disapproving look on his face as everyone in the room did right now, quite possibly the baby too— speaking of the baby….

 

“Well, I’ll be keeping you in here today, just to monitor you and continue giving you fluids, but if you eat regularly then I see no problem in discharging you, although I would suggest making an appointment with Dr Hopper.” and it was back to that cricket, what? Did he hold the secret of life?!

 

“I’m perfectly fine, I just forgot to eat because I …” she couldn’t tell him she had a curse to cast, he would make the appointment to Dr Hopper for Regina himself. “Had the baby to worry about and Sn _-Mary Margaret._ ” She instantly saw the woman’s face fall into guilt, _good_ , let her rot in that emotion. After what she had to endure by waking up next to the princess, guilt was the smallest of revenge Regina could have taken out on her for such an unfortunate turn of events.

 

“Well, I can chalk this up to stress, but I still want you to see Dr Hopper for a check in, or you could come to me next week and I’ll have a look at your vitals and eating habits.” Her eyebrows rose at the accusation, one that stabbed her so bluntly she was sure there was some blood leaking out her side from the wound. “Are you implying that I have an eating disorder, Whale?” she left out his title on purpose, the lack of respect she held for the man coming through nicely when he took a visible step back at her tone. “I’m saying, you went, for what we know, an entire week without proper sustenance and you can’t pinpoint when you started skipping meals.” He sighed and pulled his arms tighter around himself, making him look like a human pretzel, “You have a family Madame Mayor, and this is just a precaution.” She would have appreciated the sentiment had the family actually been hers, but, looking to the side where Mary Margaret had gone a shade paler from some emotion she couldn’t be bothered with and the baby that seemed content to simply curl her fingers in her mouth and sleep, Regina wondered just how much of _hers_ this family was, because the Snow she knew would have opened her mouth to speak already, to yell, argue or perhaps even shoot an arrow through Whale’s head, only this version looked at her with worry and concern, the only sound falling from her lips a small sigh.

 

Snow White had become **meek.**

 

Regina didn’t know whether she should have been happy at the fact that the curse got one thing right, or sad that the fight she loved to instigate in Snow had disappeared altogether, but the personality of her nemesis was the last thing on the Mayor’s mind, what with the child that now lived in her house being of a questionable parentage, sporting a name she would have never approved of. “Fine,” she agreed, pulling her hand free from Mary Margaret’s again, hoping the woman would just leave the poor limb alone because that morning was as close as they had been in a long time, an episode Regina really wouldn’t want to repeat especially in a public place were eyes would judge and she would get arrested for slapping her wife if she attempted anything crass again.

 

Nodding his head at the agreement, a hesitant one at best, Dr Whale pulled the chart back up to scribble something on it and then left the room with a look to the Mayor that held a disbelief over her actually keeping the appointment, perhaps he would call Dr Hopper just to be sure their Mayor was healthy enough for office, otherwise the stand in Mayor would be Mr Gold and of the two of them, Regina was the lesser evil.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Mary Margaret whispered, tears rimming her eyes as if she was guilty for the lack of Regina’s discipline when it came to meal times and for once since waking up in the cursed town, the Mayor smiled a true and wonderful smile over the suffering she saw reflected in the expression that crossed her supposed wife’s face. “Oh, I didn’t want to worry you, after all, you just gave birth and what help would you have been? All **broken** inside?” her teeth bared itself in a predatory grin, hand stroking Mary Margaret’s back in a cover for her sharp words that were meant to cut and stab across the joyful life Snow White _thought_ she lead. Perhaps this was a way for Regina to make Snow really suffer, perhaps she would make the bandit feel like how she had felt all those years living as Leopold’s wife, slowly breaking her down until she was nothing more than a pretty thing to take along to balls in a show of manliness because he had managed to secure such a small obedient little girl as a scratching post for his desires, but maybe that was a little too harsh, after all she had made the man pay for his crimes when his friend the Genie betrayed him with the bite of a snake that brought about pain like no other.

 

The baby began to fuss, a small irritating sound that had Regina push herself up into a better position and watch as Mary Margaret slowly walked over to the child in order to unclip her safety belts and pull her up into a cradle like hug that said Regina had managed to hurt the one who hurt her so long ago. “You really have changed,” she heard Mary Margaret say, although she sounded more like her old self, the spoiled princess asking Regina why she didn’t play with her anymore, why she stopped walking with her to lessons and why she tried to **kill** her, which made Regina roll her eyes in response. The innocence she found there only served to anger Regina and her fist slammed against the bed to release some of the growing pressure behind her eyes. It wasn’t as if this was her dream life, a person she hated bonded to her with a child she was slightly terrified of, and now there were questions that she couldn’t answer without sounding just a little insane.

 

“You keep saying that, when I am not the one who changed!” She hadn’t changed, she was still the same evil queen who lusted after Snow White’s heart and now that she was in this land, it seemed she wasn’t clear enough when she got the maiden’s love instead; a heart, _yes_ , but not the literal one she wanted. “Whose child is that?” she asked slowly, looking at the baby that had quietened her cries to simple hiccups, tiny fist beating against Snow’s chest in search of milk she would receive after the conversation was done most likely, or if Mary Margaret had it in her, then perhaps Regina would be given a show she didn’t want to see in the private hospital room they afforded her due to her status in the cursed society. “ **Ours** , Emma is ours, Regina.” the answer was insistent, but the mayor knew better, “John Doe, do you know him?”

 

Mary Margaret frowned at the question and chose to sit down on the plush sofa on Regina’s left instead of standing for what she assumed was going to be a lengthy discussion that would hopefully reveal why Regina had suddenly become the person she had once feared before they began their love affair. “Yes, he’s the man who has been in a coma for as long as anyone can remember, you were the one who found him— why— why are you asking me this?” she shifted Emma from her arms to her shoulder where the child rested her head on Mary Margaret’s chest, seemingly content to simply listen to her mother’s heartbeat.

 

“Who is the father of…?” she couldn’t bring herself to describe the child as hers, or Snow’s or anyone else for that matter, so she simply nodded at the babe and hoped that she was just a village child the curse had placed in her arms as part of the happy ending she had envisioned while coming to the land which once held so much promise. She watched as Snow rocked the baby, patting her back lightly in a soothing notion while considering her words very carefully. “You didn’t answer my question,” Mary Margaret said, making Regina widen her eyes at the bold statement only to look down in shame. Why did Regina want to know about Emma’s history? She could have provided the excuse of the child’s health, after all she was a month premature, but Mary Margaret was her biological mother, any details regarding Emma’s health could be taken from her, so the excuse was in itself invalid if Regina chose to play that card.

 

Groaning, Regina let her head fall back on the pillows and looked straight ahead instead. She could come clean about her doubts of Emma, or simply play it with a lame excuse that anyone would see through. Choosing to act like she was being a little honest, Regina opted for a sigh and ran her fingers through her hair. “Emma is not mine,” she said slowly, twisting her fingers in the sheets while she spoke, because any child would not be hers, not really, not unless she had legally attained them, and even then there was always going to be the threat of the birth parents that would shatter the illusion that she had managed to create a family.

 

Sensing the distress, Mary Margaret walked over to the edge of Regina’s bed and slowly lowered herself on the unoccupied part of the mattress, while gently moving Emma back into the cradle her arm had created. “Regina look at me, Emma is _yours_ , we both made sure of that and if you want to go through the paperwork again and your countless stained shirts from the unfortunate times I didn’t reach the bathroom in the morning, then I’m sure you will see just how much Emma is yours— _ours,_ and nothing is going to take that away from us.” She reached out gently to stroke Regina’s cheek, but the mayor jerked away and all Mary Margaret could do was sigh at the way she suddenly repulsed Regina. It hurt in the morning and that could be attributed to the brunette’s lack of energy, the fact that she was not a morning person or the very simple point that she had forgone food and drink in the last week, but now it stung and there was no excuse.

 

“Why do you want to know about John Doe?” She asked instead, pulling her hand back to cuddle Emma instead, at least one woman in the house still loved her, even if it was for the simple fact that she was a feeding machine. “He’s the father isn’t he? This John Doe that sleeps in the hospital, taking up city funds.” Crossing her arms, Regina looked every bit the spoiled queen she often blamed Snow for being and pouted at the jealousy she was sure she hadn’t felt before, but the emotion came from nowhere, like a small fog that seemed to fill in her mind, reminiscent of the curse cloud she had used to take everyone away in the first place.

 

“We both sat together, looking through files, descriptions and traits with pictures so small you had to squint!” Mary Margaret snapped, making the mayor look to her with wide eyes that held the shock she felt at the outburst, even Emma began to squirm at the sound, kicking out her little legs that was covered in a pink romper, protesting against the harsh sound she heard. Even while trying to sooth her daughter by getting up and pacing the room instead, Mary Margaret still looked furious at Regina’s accusation that she had an affair with a man she couldn’t even place in the town if her life depended on it. “All of them were John Doe’s Regina! Their names weren’t given out but yes, the sperm donor we chose had blonde hair and a strong jaw, not because of his looks but because he had qualities that you liked. I insisted that we find someone who looked like you, but apparently you preferred his brawn and instinct, what do you want me to do?!” Appalled, Regina looked to Snow, who was certainly acting like her old self, a sight that had Regina’s lower belly clench in arousal she hadn’t allowed herself to feel at all.

 

Choosing to remain silent, the mayor looked down instead and thought through the idea’s that began to form in her mind. There were a great many reasons for this debacle, but the heavy breathing of the pixie haired brunette rendered her unable to concentrate.

 

“Mrs Blanchard?” She heard from the doorway, startling the three occupants in the room after such a heavy silence, “We need you fill out a few forms, if you would follow me.” smiling kindly at Mary Margaret, the nurse gestured for her to follow, but at another wail from Emma, she paused and frowned at the child instead, considering her options. “Regina, I need to concentrate on the paperwork, would you mind taking Emma for a few minutes? I’ll be right back.” she didn’t wait for an answer before she pushed the child in Regina’s arms and left the two of them alone with the loudest cry she had ever heard from her daughter drowning out as she walked further away _. Regina has this, she’s capable enough_ , Mary Margaret thought as she tried to reassure herself of her wife’s skills when it came to the child Regina hadn’t really held until now.

 

 

 


	4. Tugging on Heartstrings

CHAPTER 3: TUGGING ON HEARTSTRINGS

 

* * *

 

 

THE BABY WAS PASSED to her like she was _entirely_ capable of handling the now squirming bundle she was sure knew the plan she had to kill Snow White’s **real** child once she had her hands on it, but now, with little Emma in her hands, Regina wasn’t so sure what to do with the babe other than hold it out in front of her like some disease ridden blanket that would infect her if she held it any closer than an arms length away.

 

There was a reason she took that potion, that clear liquid that looked harmless but tore her insides apart, because what love did she deserve after all the horrible things she did in its name? Mother was right, she was— _is_ unlovable and the wailing child that looked as if it had been beaten was a true testament to her lack of motherly skills. What she needed was for Snow to come back in here, grab the blonde baby and leave her alone to rot in the curse that would make time stand still. She wasn’t entirely sure how much more of a crying baby she could handle anyways, let alone twenty eight years of it.

 

The baby kicked and screamed, whether to try and get away from Regina or yell her protest at the position the Mayor held her at, the brunette couldn’t quite know, nor did she want to, because out of the two of them, _Regina_ was certainly in more pain. She had been burning with hatred for Snow White for years and suddenly she wakes up in her town to find the very person sleeping next to her? That pain of being bonded to her stepdaughter after she had to endure Leopold stung like no other, and the people walking past her room throwing her dirty looks certainly didn’t hold any weight for their ungodly opinion on what a bad mother she must be because the child screamed and screamed and _screamed_ her way down to the deepest depths of Regina’s aching soul, and a small part of her wanted to drop the child on the floor and bolt out of the room in a stream of agonising wails that would rival Emma’s, yet before she could do good on her thoughts a nurse came in, most likely to complain about the noise, but at the sight that greeted her, all she could do was widen her eyes in surprise at the way Regina held her new-born daughter, or maybe it was the look on the former queen’s face that radiated something between disgust and fear, but the poor soul surged forwards, hands outstretched to take the baby from the Mayor, to relieve her of the stress; after all Regina was a patient here and was this even allowed? But before the little mousy thing could even touch Emma, Regina jerked the child back, a feral snarl on her lips and a question of, “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” slipping from her sharp tongue. She still held Emma a fair distance away, but closer now that the woman had approached her bed, eyebrows raised high in defence over her actions, but the Mayor was having none of it.

 

What would Snow White, that gloating _brat_ say when she walked into the room finding her child in the arms of a stranger because Regina had been to **weak** to care for a new-born whose worst possible act could be spilling the contents of her stomach on the paper gown she didn’t want to think about chaffing her skin?

 

“Uh, helping you Madame Mayor… I will take her if—”

 

“I don’t need your help! She’s **my** daughter!” The wailing child quieted down to small hiccups instead, most likely to hear the commotion happening, to gossip abut it to her other baby friends if she made any, or perhaps the possession in the Mayor’s voice was enough for Emma to feel comfortable with the brunette she barely recognised. The nurse for the better part looked terrified— _good_. Regina was not about to seem useless just because she couldn’t handle a child (which she couldn’t, but still…), and _her_ child no less, even if the _curse_ had supplied the child to her, one that apparently wasn’t Charming’s by the definition of Mary Margret’s memories. Perhaps it was the simple fact that Snow White had given birth a few minutes before she stormed in, that the curse supplied a child ripped from another mother’s arms so that the pain between Snow’s legs when she woke would be justified, and so far she hadn’t died holding the blonde, so maybe she wasn’t the saviour after all. T _he saviour_ , Regina mused, had escaped through the wardrobe (a badly made one) before she got there, and the thing had been emptied of whatever resided in it when she broke open the lock.

 

The idea of that child still out there made the former queen shudder and in turn caused the instinctual move of wrapping her arms around herself to bring her aching limbs closer, the promise of holding her thoughts together along with the body she abused on so many occasions seeming _oh_ so near, but when her arms had encircled around her chest, there was a _little_ obstruction that burrowed further into her, a moving, squirming thing, a previously **crying** thing that picked up the pitch of its incessant need to be heard. There it was then, the child she despised for not being hers held to her chest like she _wanted_ it there, like she _loved_ it, like she felt _something_ …. stirring in her heart over the baby she would have never got if not for the curse; and there it sat, the purple fog in her brain, washing over her emotions to make her smile down at the baby, a soft, barely there thing, but if anyone knew the mayor, they would know a tiny twitch was enough to crack the heavy wall around her heart.

 

Pulling Emma closer to her chest, the girl pressed into her chest searching for Regina’s breast in hunger she knew was usually sated at her mother’s beating chest. The move was not lost on the smitten mayor and for the first time, the former queen was at a complete loss of what to do. “I don’t have milk,” she said softly, addressing the little bundle in her arms, her voice taking on a soft breathy tone, one that had the nurse nearly faint at the change she saw in the woman she tended to a few hours ago, and even asleep the brunette had been terrifying. After all, the curse had supplied little Miss poppet with memories of the Mayor tearing through the hospital in a fury, asking for her wife’s health, whether her child was fine, why there was a need for so many tubes— and then she remembered the moment no one was supposed to see in the children’s ward after visiting hours, when the mighty mayor had leaned over the child’s form, tears running down her cheeks in a helpless kind of sadness at not being able to do anything, but even then, Nurse poppet had run away, fearful of her fate should the Mayor have seen her at such a heartfelt moment.

 

Stroking the tuft of blonde hair, Regina sighed and looked up to the nurse, one eyebrow raised in question of her appearance until she remembered Snow’s instructions before she left— there was some bag… maybe it had some for of sustenance for Emma. Spotting a bottle strapped to the side of an atrociously pink bag, Regina sighed out in relief and looked to the nurse again. She might as well still be queen if this person insisted on staying, and what better way to entertain herself than to boss her servants around?

 

“Pass me that instrument there.” the order was every bit the evil queen, although it was softened by the hospital paper gown and baby in her arms, making her look as if she herself had given birth to the innocent irritating thing. Getting the hint, the nurse reached into the bag next to the carrier and produced the bottle half filled with milk inside that Regina didn’t want to think about the contents of, because the last thing she needed was an image of Mary Margaret pumping her breast milk into the bottle, although now that it was there, the feeling of a soft maternal pride swelled in her heart, one she didn’t ever remember feeling, one she didn’t allow herself to feel, one that brought forth memories she doesn’t remember having.

 

_“What are you doing?” Regina asked, leaning against the doorway of the incomplete nursery, one she knew she still had a month to complete, but little Emma decided to come early and left her with a changing table still to be set up and diapers to buy._

_“I read that breast milk could be pumped and I need a break… my breasts ache and I haven’t slept.” Mary Margret looked about ready to close her eyes and fall off the chair, and to think she had only been back home for one day._

_“Here let me do that and then I want you in bed. I didn’t buy that baby monitor for nothing and I intend to use it.” Chuckling at Regina’s antics, Mary Margret shyly pulled her shirt further over her covered breast and looked down at the carpeted floor instead, “Regina I wouldn’t ask you to do that… its… not—”_

_She was cut off with a fierce kiss and a look that said the mayor wasn’t having it. “I have quite literally been inside you, pressing a pump so that you are not in pain is not something to squirm about, now come to bed and I’ll sort it all out.”_

Gasping, Regina blinked a few times, making the purple fog disappear, a fog that only got stronger as the day progressed. Perhaps if she slept the entire time? Or maybe this was because she hadn’t any food in her system and the baby she held to her chest was a little distraction from her evil ways. Yes, think evil thoughts— Snow White’s head on a plate, peasants bowing so low before her their noses touched the ground, and prisoners beaten to death with the end of her whip; but it still didn’t shake the feeling of being out of control, something she **hated**. There had to be something more to these soft fog emotions that flittered through her head and passed like they were always there. Maybe later when she had time to go over the workings of her curse, a bottle of wine and her vault for company, she would figure out the intricacies of it with little disturbance.

 

The bottle felt warm in her hand once it was pressed into her palm, the nurse watching expectantly as she uncapped the top and lowered the plastic nipple for Emma to latch on without much of a fuss… she must have been hungry then. “Anything else you need, Madame Mayor?” the nurse asked, carefully stepping back because the empty, worried look the mayor adorned only spelled disaster and at the small shake of her head instead of the usual snappy N _o_ had nurse poppet scamper away once the child was quiet and her head was saved from being ripped off.

 

It must have been only a few minutes of rocking Emma slowly, hearing her soft sucking sounds while the child closed her eyes to listen to a broken woman’s heartbeat when Mary Margaret came in, looking frazzled and irritated, splotches of red dotting her cheeks with anger she rarely felt, but at the sight that greeted her just outside the door, the teacher sighed out at the beauty of her wife and child bonding. She had often wondered how lovely it would be to have Regina carry a child, one that had her dark hair and brooding personality, one that Regina could call her own— not that Emma wasn’t Regina’s, but sometimes Mary Margaret saw the way Regina looked at Emma, like there was a piece of the child missing, _Regina’s piece_. Cursing herself for leaving her camera inside Emma’s carrier bag, Mary Margaret burned the picture in her mind’s eye instead, hoping that sometime in the future she would see the same thing again.

 

Slowly, as if not to disturb the image, Mary Margaret crept into the room, seated herself on the chair at the door and watched carefully how Emma pushed the bottle away from her, crying out just a little when the milk that Regina had yet to pull away from the child dribbled down her neck for a few seconds. At the sound of discomfort, the Mayor pulled the bottle back, replaced the cap and searched for some kind of cloth to wipe the excess milk off the child, catching Mary Margret’s eye in the process. The brunette could see Regina tense up at the sight of her, the way in which her eyes narrowed like she was disgusted, and then the baby was being pushed from her chest as if some sort of realisation that the child she held was Mary Margaret’s.

 

It stung, it always did, but right after she had Emma, Regina had been the most wonderful parent and wife, always making sure she had everything she desired, although in one sleep, the woman she married seemed to have reverted into the person she had distanced herself from in the beginning, a person with walls so high… there was no way to get in.

 

“Take her,” Mary Margaret heard and just like the good wife she was, got up from her spot, softness in her eyes despite the hurt there and plucked the content child from her mother’s arms who started to cry for a few seconds until she realised the person now holding her was the one who had embraced her first. This was routine now, where she would place a facecloth over her shoulder after wiping Emma’s face and then bounce the child until she burped. The first time she had done it, Regina had rushed into the room asking what happened to their child to make such a sound, but by the second time she had burped Emma, with Regina in the room, the only thing that happened was that the once feared mayor let out a little giggle at the sound, walked forwards and pressed a kiss to the top of her new-born’s head and whispered a, _that’s my girl,_ before leaving to complete the task she had left.

 

Although now, that look of disgust with an intensity she hadn’t noticed before when Emma burped was still evident. It made her wonder if her wife had lost her memory… she had asked odd questions before, answers that were apart of their lives, but seeing her with Emma turned that idea on its head.

 

Oh God, what if Regina was cheating on her? Mary Margaret was sure she read somewhere that husbands (she omitted the gender bias) were prone to cheating on pregnant wives, and in the town where there were so many beautiful men and women Regina could have easily fallen into bed with anyone. There was Graham, Kathryn, even Ruby. Her best friend had often joked of stealing her wife, but she wouldn’t really do that would she? The thought of outright asking Regina seemed like a death sentence, and besides it was something based on speculation without an ounce of proof, it would only make their relationship strained and hideous to work with.

 

“Regina?” Mary Margaret called after a few minutes of watching Regina’s fingers curl and uncurl over the blanket. “I want real clothes,” the mayor said slowly, crossing her arms over her chest, “I feel naked and that Whale looked at me like he saw _everything._ ” It was as if Regina was speaking over her instead of _to_ her and for some odd reason it made her feelings of anger tick like a bomb. “Regina look at me!” she hadn’t snapped at Regina before in her life, there had been times of course when she raised her voice to match the Mayor’s, but never has she _ever_ used her teacher voice on the grown woman.

 

That seemed to get Regina’s attention, making her head snap to the side with wide surprised eyes, and for someone who hated surprises she had been getting an awful lot of them recently .“What is it?” she snapped back, watching as the baby was placed in her carrier, curling in on herself to slip into a peaceful sleep as her mothers bit at each other like crocodiles.

 

“I went over the paperwork,” Mary Margaret started, crossing her arms over her chest and Regina just wanted to hide away under the blankets while she worked the curse out in her head, why she woke up as Snow’s wife, who Emma belonged to, why she had that memory flashback or insert whatever, why she felt sudden emotions, why Gold behaved as if he knew something and most of all why Snow acted like…well, _Snow._

The furthest she got was that the curse was designed for her happy ending, or to punish Snow White, make her lose everything she held dear. Perhaps as much as the curse was her punishment, it was also Snow’s. What if, twenty eight years from now _, if_ the curse has to ever break, Snow wakes up to find herself defiled by her stepmother, a wailing baby in her arms most certainly not hers and a man in a coma that died due to unfortunate circumstances actually her husband? But then Regina would have to lower her standards in order to bed the brat and she would have to knowingly put up with a child for the rest of her days if the curse did not break, so perhaps it was more _her_ stupidity that would get her punished other than Snow.

 

Sighing in defeat over the workings of this world’s magic, the mayor pulled her arms closer around herself and looked up at the dear old Snow White only to bark out a laugh. “Oh dear!” barely able to contain her giggles, Regina covered her mouth with her hand so that the nurses tending to her wouldn’t come into the room and send her to the asylum she had underneath the very facility she was now admitted in. “Who dared to piss you off? You look like a tomato!” sighing out the last of her laughter, leaving a small smile in its wake, Regina waited for an answer while looking the former bandit up and down, now knowing how she could spend her days with the brat. If she could just get Snow angry enough, she was sure her face would light up like a flame, or perhaps a little flirtation to make her squirm… oh yes there were a few perks indeed.

 

“Dr Whale! And it’s not funny!” clenching her fists in a show of anger that was defeated by the smile on her face, Mary Margaret resigned herself to simply sitting beside Regina and gazing down at her smiling face. “Dr Whale, he… I was just doing the paperwork and he comes up behind me, says these terrible things and expects me to fall for him,” scoffing, Mary Margaret reached for Regina’s hand absently, missing the stiffening of the woman beside her, “He said I still look…” she squirmed in her seat but ploughed on, taking Regina’s silence as a cue for her to continue, “ _hot_ and that if I wanted a real man, then he would be available.”

 

The blush of embarrassment evident on Snow’s cheeks should have made her glad, she should have taken the opportunity to show indifference. She didn’t love snow White, the evil queen _despised_ the girl, but here she was sleeping in a hospital bed with feelings of a territorial jealousy rising up in her throat like bile. As usual all emotions she didn’t want was accompanied by the fog that she tried to push aside by glancing at the baby fast asleep in her carrier, a little too far away to reach out and hold her again, because of everyone, the person she knew herself to be, the evil of queens, actually saw something that could be made with a child, no matter whose it was— unless it was the saviour then a swift blade to the throat would do, but if the child was a simple village idiot’s spawn, then Regina could tolerate that, she could even _love_ that, and once this Mary Margaret was out of the way, whether by a divorce or murder, she would finally be happy.

 

“I’m sorry to do this Madame Mayor, but visiting hours are over. You can come back tonight at seven or tomorrow at nine.” the sound of the nurse startled them both out of the silence they had fallen into and a soft nod from Mary Margaret later, had Regina realise her hand was still in the brat’s hold. Pulling her hand free, Regina pushed herself further up against the pillows she had slipped down from over the course of the last hour and let her darkened eyes stare into Snow’s. “Don’t worry about Whale, dear. He is just a fool with no sense of stability that preys on things he wishes he had.” while it was the truth, it also sounded like Regina was going to unleash an army on the man for hitting on her wife, well not exactly hitting on her, but being a persistent little bastard that had the audacity to speak to a woman whose wife was admitted into the hospital in such a demeaning manner.

 

Even if Regina was going with the _women have rights’_ excuse in her head, the way Snow’s face lit up at the words suggested that perhaps she had taken it in the worst way. “Don’t do anything foolish, I’ll be back later today.” At that, Regina’s eyes widened. She didn’t want to see Snow again and once she was discharged the woman would always be around… she just, needed these few hours to think. “No dear, traveling with Emma so often is not good, you can come back tomorrow. For today just rest.” Smiling to seal the deal, Regina even patted the woman’s cheek affectionately to let it sink in and hoped Mary Margaret wouldn’t kiss her goodbye.

 

“Oh alright then, but tomorrow Dr Whale will discharge you. Try to eat something tonight, and don’t think I’m not upset about the entire starve yourself thing. We will be having words when you get home, but just…” she grabbed Regina’s arm, letting the worry be conveyed through her touch, “… get better.” Nodding at the request, Mary Margaret seemed satisfied and went to retrieve the pink bag Regina reminded herself to replace with something darker along with the carrier that held Emma, who only blinked at the change in height before succumbing to the call of sleep again. Then just as Regina was sure they were going to leave, Snow leaned down to press a kiss to the top of her head, which honestly much better than the romantic one she had gotten at the start of her day, but despite all the bad things that had happened, the fact that Snow brought the carrier down to her eye level for her to look at Emma and said in a childishly nasal voice, “Say bye-bye to Mummy,” had Regina’s heart swell.

 

She was a Mummy, she had someone to call her that. The queen no matter how dysfunctional, had a _family_ , which needed a few changes but it was there and she could manage for a week before she got rid of Snow. She would manage if it was for the simple fact that got to hold Emma again— of course provided she wasn’t the saviour, which she doubted, but still, one could never be sure.

 

It took another minute of smiling and waving until Snow and Emma were out the door, leaving her blissfully alone once again, the sun setting behind her window calling for the end of the day, and while she never usually slept unless in an intoxicated state or with a handful of restless tossing and turning nights, Regina felt herself slip into a calm like slumber that she would be eternally grateful for.

 


	5. Hospital Mornings

CHAPTER 4: HOSPITAL MORNINGS

 

* * *

 

SHE HAD AWOKEN when the sun had risen again, this time the light assaulting her eyes far more cheery than the one she had gone to sleep with, informing her of the number of odd hours she had let her body rest— and what a needed slumber that was. Not only was Regina left feeling refreshed and revitalised, but the thought that she would get to see her ba— _the child_ Snow was holding, warmed her heart like it hadn’t been in so many years since she had lost Daniel to the only child she had ever been affectionate towards.

 

Smiling to herself, Regina pushed the hospital blankets away, turning to let her bare feet touch the cold tiled floor that had managed to make sure she was wide awake, and yelped in resistance to the sharp contrast of the cocoon she had been in earlier. During her little dance, the Mayor noticed a small black bag peeking out from under the bed, a bag obviously dark enough to belong to her; she was sure she remembered how she had purchased the thing and thought to herself about how it was wholly unnecessary since she never went anywhere and _then_ how Mary Margaret had enticed her to pack for a weekend that required _something casual, Regina_ , which for her consisted of t-shirts and suit pants, but that seemed good enough for the pixie haired brunette that had the _audacity_ to take her into the woods for a romantic getaway. Shuddering at the memory that seemed to accompany the usual purple fog, the former queen reminded herself to look into the matter of that blasted mist, lest the memories become too much for her to bear or worse— make her actually see Snow White in a different light other than the **red** one that she had painted in her head of the princess’s blood on her hands in far less appropriate ways than a simple marriage that seemed much _too_ loving for her unruly and possessive nature.

 

Bending to pick the bag up, Regina saw a change of clothes, underwear and a pair of her favourite black pumps all neatly packed with a note on top scribbled in writing she knew from another life saying obnoxious things like: c _ame to see you last night, but you were asleep. Emma says Hi! And here are the clothes I know you wanted. Love you._ It wasn’t signed, but Mary Margaret didn’t need to pen her name at the bottom of such a flowery note that she probably thought was sweet instead of irritating to the point that Regina had unconsciously let her lip curl into a snarl while reading and re-reading the words to make sure that this entire situation she had cursed herself into was real.

 

The punishment, one she didn’t deserve by any standards, (although the former queen knew she was lying to herself on that one) was a nightmare she often had while living in the castle with Leopold and the little brat. Regina was sure, no matter Snow’s age, that had the holy terror been a boy, she would have been in the middle of a very dangerous fight between father and son as if she were a piece of meat. There was no doubt that Snow had asked for Regina in one way or another, the brat had often confessed to her when they were alone (Snow was obviously young enough not to know when to keep quiet about things), that she had originally wanted Regina for herself, and her father thinking his little princess needed a friend had sought to provide the woman as her mother instead of lover. Looking back on it now, with Snow White married to a man so different from her, Regina wondered if the marriage was simply a way of throwing aside all desires and jumping head first into a relationship that offered security instead of passion.

 

Sighing to herself, the former queen lay back in the stiff bed for a moment longer after dropping the bag of clothing down on the floor, and tried to rid herself of thoughts that would do no good in a world that did not require her knowledge of the past she had erased for good, even if her own future looked horrible.

 

“Rough night?” she heard, turning her head to the sound to consider the man who leaned against the doorframe as if he owned the town— oh wait, he did. Damn.

 

“Gold,” she greeted stiffly, pulling the scratchy blanket up to cover her paper gown form, trying to hide as much of her weaknesses from the person who would use them to his advantage (no matter the cost for her) by sitting upright to seem a little more regal. “I heard you were in hospital, I came to simply check whether Madame Mayor had kicked the bucket or not.”

 

“Oh don’t be ridiculous,” Regina snapped, watching as he hobbled in to sit in the same seat Snow had occupied the night before, “A few days without sustenance is not going to kill me.”

 

“But something or the other will, just give it time.” And there was that knowing smirk again, the one that Regina desperately wanted to rip off the bastard’s face and feed to him, but being sophisticated, especially in front of her former mentor who she wasn’t sure possessed his memories or not, required a much more calculated approach that wouldn’t reveal much of anything.

 

 “I don’t need to worry about _time_ , but thank you for the visit.” Nodding her head at the door in what she hoped he got as a silent gesture to get the hell out, Gold simply looked over her like he was missing something and then hobbled to the door, hand pausing on the handle before speaking in a hushed tone, back facing the queen whose spine stayed as stiff as if she sat on her throne instead of against the fluffy pillows of the hospital bed. “Everyone needs to worry about time Regina, especially _you._ ” He left with a bang of the glass door swinging behind him, the usual limp in his step that Regina was mildly curious about accompanying his brisk walk out of the hospital and into her head where she stewed in the mess he had made of time, and worry, and everything in between that had begun its task of eating her up from inside out— because Regina, as much as she hated to admit, was alone in this world, memories of the old land only belonging to her and _maybe_ Jefferson, but he wouldn’t take too kindly to the woman who cursed him knocking on his front door looking for company in this madness.

 

So Regina sat and breathed in and out, hoping the way her lungs were filling and emptying will eventually calm her down, but the time for silence and brooding came to an abrupt halt when a gust of wind waltzed passed her, a cheery voice that Regina suspected was from a good lay the night before assaulting her ears with, “Good morning Madame Mayor, _ah_ , Yoga, I got my fill last night, if you know what I mean.” Wiggling his eyebrows at her in what the Mayor assumed must be some sort of cry for validation of his manhood, Regina simply leaned back in her pillows and raised an eyebrow at the man who really needed to consider who he was retelling all his trysts to.

 

“If you’re done gloating about spreading STD’s, then shall we get to it Whale? Or do you want me to high five you so that you feel capable enough to do your job?” blinking slowly in an act of annoyance, Regina watched as Whale cleared his throat awkwardly and unclipped her chart from the edge of the bed, unknowingly making Regina squirm, because as much as she would like to put up a farce about bravery, she wasn’t very keen on receiving bad news, especially before she got to shower and brush her teeth.

 

“Well, looks to me that you’re doing fine, better than fine actually. All your vitals are good, you’re taking in less fluid and you seem reasonably awake… despite your bedhead.” he chuckled at this but cleared his throat again when he saw the glare the mayor sent away, looking down at the chart once more and completely missing the frantic way in which she smoothed her unruly hair down— was that why Gold looked at her like that? How embarrassing!

 

“We did say we were going to discharge you today, and I am pretty sure you’re healthy enough so long as you eat regularly and keep that appointment with Dr Hopper on Friday, then you’re free to go as soon as Mary Margaret comes to pick you up.” it should have been good news, great news actually that she was healthy and ready to enjoy her curse, but no, this was bad news, one she wasn’t prepared for because it had only been a day since the curse was cast, a day since she woke up in bed with Snow White, had the same woman kiss her on the mouth rather passionately and then claim to be married to her using the most beautiful ring adorning her finger, complete with a child that came with the curse –  free of charge except for the heart and work she put into something only for it to become her living nightmare. Gods did Regina just want to bury herself into a mountain of pillows and scream for her fate because this was not what she asked for. What she wanted was a house to herself, with Snow White wandering around town away from her like a lost puppy, and Charming in a coma that she could kill at any time without an identity and—

 

_Charming._

Clearing her throat and putting on a fake politician smile she had used on almost everyone she wanted something from, Regina folded her hands neatly across her lap and tilted her head to look like a helpless little puppy. “This John Doe that is in a coma…” she began, watching as Whale steadied his stance by widening his legs and crossing his arms over his chest after clipping her board back at the edge of her bed. “Yes?” he asked, frowning in confusion

 

“Where did he come from?” the laugh she was greeted with had her jerk back in insult, and only after Whale had recovered did he realise that maybe his actions were not the best. “Regina you were the one who brought him here, you of all people know that we don’t know who he is or where he came from, but I suppose we could look into the case a little more. But honestly, he’s been in a coma for so long—“ Whale frowned at this, trying to remember just when John Doe had slipped into a coma, when he had fallen into a sleep like no other, and Regina? Well Regina felt the familiar tinge of the purple fog filtering through her mind until she was left with the image that had her startled.

 

_“I’ll miss you,” Mary Margaret said, hands around Regina’s neck as she pulled the new mayor in for another kiss that consisted of more giggles than anything, and if Regina had known that her girlfriend was such a light weight then perhaps she wouldn’t have encouraged her to a drinking contest between the two of them._

_“I’ll miss you too dear, but I will see you tomorrow”. Pushing Mary Margaret back by her hands to lightly let their fingers intertwine between them instead, the Mayor leaned forwards one last time and pressed her lips to the pixie haired woman’s forehead before moving back towards her trusty car._

_“You could come inside, we could have a cup of coffee.” And there was the innocence that Regina had found endearing being thrown back at her again, but as always she had to be responsible, and as new mayor she couldn’t start slacking off on her work by walking into the office with sex hair and the night before clothes. “Maybe some other time, but_ you _should have some coffee, for the hangover tomorrow I mean.” Dodging a blow to her arm, Regina stepped away from the sidewalk with an air kiss thrown at her girlfriend, but jumped in surprise when she heard a man’s voice clear as day just a few steps away._

_“You both are cute, and lucky. Love—” he swayed a little, “is not for everyone.” And down he went, blonde hair and blue eyes hitting concrete with a thud, words he would be remembered by echoing around them until Regina had gained enough wits about herself to shove Mary Margaret into her apartment and call an ambulance for the supposed John Doe with no ID other than an apparent heartbreak._

“He’s been out of it for a long time,” Whale finished lamely, scratching his head to say he wasn’t entirely satisfied with his answer, but in a few minutes it wouldn’t bother him anyways. “Yes well,” Regina replied, voice a bit hoarse after that memory she hadn’t been expecting nor wanted to remember, especially when she simply wanted to press her fingers against her lips and relive the experience that this other side of her had been quite happy about; and that was it wasn’t it? This Mayor Mills seemed content, blissfully happy with her wife and child and a town that she could control, whereas the Queen looked at the sham of a life and wanted to retch in the toilet at the disgust she felt. The split between her two worlds, her two realities was much more than a punishment she could handle. “It’s quite alright, I was just curious as to whether there were any changes to the case is all.” offering the man a tight lipped smile as to warn him from pressing further, Regina let out a breath of relief when Whale simply nodded and conveyed instructions to the nurse on how her drip had to be taken out with care.

 

Regina had to see Charming, she was sure that he, no matter how comatose, would provide her with some sort of answer on at least the origins of the child. “Oh and Whale?” she called just before he left the room, “Could you rather inform Sn- _Mary Margaret,_ ” She had to stop stuttering over her name like that so often, “that she should fetch me at nine during visiting hours? I don’t want to wake her with the baby and all that.” A fake smile was plastered on, but that was only because the extension of her discharge would provide her with a good one and a half hours to get showered, fed and interrogate an unconscious man.

 

Whale nodded again, pleased with her concern over family and saluted her like some fool before nearly tripping over his feet looking at a nurse passing by. Her drip was removed with little pain and the nurse who had tended to her smiled kindly before pointing in the direction of the private bathroom that came with the room. Grateful, Regina picked up the bag from the floor, and checking to see if no one saw her, hopped all the way across the cold tiles barefoot while one hand held together the open back of her paper gown until she disappeared inside the well-kept area that served her for a good thirty minutes of a relaxing shower she actually paused to appreciate.

 

After she had amused herself enough and ran a brush through her hair and teeth, the Mayor emerged with a crisp white shirt and black slacks that she much preferred over the tiny dress she had on the other day. Regina stalked out of the room with her now empty bag, already assuming that Snow had taken her other clothes with her in favour of that blasted gown she might be inclined to believe was just another joke, and headed straight for the ICU ward where a particular bed held a sleeping figure of the man she honestly didn’t want to be the father of her child— Snow’s child— their child, _whatever,_ but this man shouldn’t even consider trying to be a part of that messed up family she may have secured due to her curse that _also_ may have royally screwed her life over.

 

“Charming,” she addressed the man coldly, looking over his sleeping form with distain on her features, but at no response, she leaned down and poked him with her finger, hoping he would get up and reassure her that he had no part in her daughter’s genetic makeup, but he stayed still and Regina kept poking if only to bruise the man she hated just as much as Snow White.

 

“Okay _fine_ , you better listen closely pretty boy, because while you’re sleeping here, I’m busy in my large mansion that could house ten of your farms, with a wife that looks oddly like yours—” she pouted in thought for dramatic effect, “Oh wait, it _is_ little Miss Snow White that has screamed my name over and over with my fingers buried inside her, making her feel more than you ever could with that little stick of yours.” Grinning at the gloating rights the curse gave her, even if she was lying through her teeth about everything, Regina felt an odd sort of pride settle in her chest. “And when you do wake up, even if Emma is the saviour, I will have your head if you try to take her away from me for whatever reason you simple headed sh—”

 

“Regina!” snapping her head up to meet the worried gaze of Snow White herself, the Mayor shifted from foot to foot and flushed in embarrassment, hoping Snow hadn’t heard her bragging about their sex life. “Yes dear?” she replied coolly, hands itching to reach out and take the smiling baby from the carrier she was in.

 

“What are you doing?” and there was the million dollar question wasn’t it? What was she doing? Why was she suddenly feeling so possessive over a woman she hated? Why did she care if Emma was the saviour— or more importantly _not?_ Why did she want to keep this little family intact, no matter how dysfunctional it was, no matter if she snapped at Snow and had her sleep in a different room? The question was _why?_ Why was she so intent on punishing herself with things she could never have? Granted, she didn’t want Snow White, but who’s to say the Evil Queen didn’t have desires of a husband or wife and child in a house where no one knew the horrors she had committed?   

 

“I wanted to check on him.” Regina didn’t miss the eyebrow raise at the lie, considering she had spoken about John Doe in a very negative light the last time they talked, “And I was trying to see if I could wake him up.” offering Snow a stiff smile, Regina turned her attentions to the baby who looked up at her with large eyes and kicked her legs out in an ignorant bliss she wished she had. “So you’re saying you weren’t threatening the man”

 

“No,” Regina denied, stepping forward in an attempt to diffuse the situation, because as much as Regina was afraid of ruining the curse and its balance, she was also afraid of this confrontation that was rapidly making her uncomfortable. After all was said and done, Regina, no matter where she was placed, disliked being portrayed as weak, and this notion of Emma not being hers, of her being John Doe’s instead displayed with such certainty the idea that perhaps Regina was afraid of losing a child she just barely met.

 

Narrowing her eyes at the Mayor, Mary Margaret made an attempt to question Regina’s motives again, because her behaviour was irrational, out of control and frenzied, like she had a plan that didn’t go according to her wishes and now she was scrambling to make them better by any means possible; but her words were cut off when Regina pushed passed her to glance down at the baby instead, who suddenly found the brunette’s simple necklace very entertaining and repeatedly tried to reach for it with no success.

 

 “I’ll take her out while you sign the discharge papers,” The mayor snapped, gaining her posture once more after tossing the cursed persona that seemed to linger around her away, because if she didn’t listen to her gut, she might as well offer her body and soul on a platter to the woman who had taken her happiness away from her before she even had it.

 

Snatching the carrier from Mary Margaret’s hand, Regina pulled Emma as close to her as possible and stomped out with a careless, “bring my bag dear,” tossed over her shoulder.

 

 

_She’s cheating on me,_ Mary Margaret thought, jaw hardening at the way Regina’s hips swayed, attracting the attentions of every nurse and doctor that took a moment to appreciate the Latina’s perfect behind, _and I’m going to kill the bitch that thinks its fine to touch my wife!_


	6. Welcome home

CHAPTER 5: WELCOME HOME

 

* * *

 

 

REGINA WAITED OUTSIDE the hospital building after refusing a wheelchair that was offered to her by a cheeky intern and busied herself with looking down at the child with distain. She knew logically of course that no one would judge her for wanting to pick the child up and inspect it, or hold it, or generally just stare into endless pools of forest green that reminded her too much of the lush fields she used to ride in before everything went to hell, but a big part of her reminded the young girl filled with hope and love that this child could be the product of true love which _could_ , if given the chance, ruin her entire plan for happiness that she tried to convince herself wasn’t lonely at all.

 

Emma cooed at her, trying to reach for the sky she stared up at on occasion and Regina had to resist the urge to smile back, or put the child down on the pavement so that her arms could take a break from carrying the bright pink carrier that was far heavier than it looked, but instead the Mayor steeled her jaw, pointedly ignored the child and tried to remember which contraption she was supposed to ride in with that nauseating princess; although as much as she hated those memory flashes, they didn’t come when she summoned them for something _useful_ and once again Regina was left wondering whether that too was a part of her large punishment that came in the form of Snow White kissing her like she loved her or something. Not that she was complaining about ruining the pretty little flower, it was just that she would have preferred to have a small fling she could use as blackmail instead of being legally bound to the woman with a baby barely a week old.

 

“Stop it,” she said flatly, looking down at Emma who decided that kicking her feet out was enjoyable enough, especially when they collided with Regina’s thigh. “I mean it, stop or else I’ll _…” kill you? Smother you in your sleep?_ Honestly Regina didn’t know what she would do in a situation like this and simply let the threat hang in the air hoping the child understood, which seemed to work well enough when Emma went stiff and seized her kicking for a few moments, content to rest her little sock clad feet against the smooth plane of an expensive trouser covered thigh. Sighing in relief, Regina shifted from foot to foot and hoped the imbecile would come out so that she could get out of the cold, go to the home she knew the curse had provided for her and just sleep so that she could drown out the impurity of being married to Snow White, but of course the little brat had started to fuss, making Regina grimace at the sound and choose to ignore it while doing a mental inventory of her vault that she reminded herself to visit later that day.

 

Mary Margaret had been busy the entire morning trying to find some semblance of control over the situation of her wife doing an entire 360 on her, but she supposed near lack of sleep and food would do that to a person, only with a baby and the way she knew Regina had reacted to Emma… Mary knew something was wrong.

 

Signing her name on numerous papers, Mrs Mills took to the hallway and smiled at the sight of Regina trying unsuccessfully to calm down the child who screamed at her. Standing in the shadows a bit longer, Mary Margaret watched with amusement as Regina placed the carrier on the pavement and lifted the child up into her arms, only to repel at a pungent smell that would most likely be the reason for Emma’s discomfort. “Here, let me” Mary Margaret offered, holding out her hands for the child that was placed in her care not long after.

 

“She has a dirty diaper,” Mary Margaret stated, holding the child to her chest.

 

“I know very well what she has!” Regina snapped, smoothing over her shirt and reaching down to pick up the carrier.

 

“If you can sooth her, then I can drive us home until we can change her properly.” Mary Margaret’s request was met with smouldering eyes that glared daggers at her. There was no way in hell Regina was going to hold a smelly baby in a strange contraption on the way to her shared home with her arch nemesis— Only that was _exactly_ what she did.

 

“Welcome home!” The chipper voice said, causing Regina to flinch at the tone while she took in the surroundings of her new cursed house, one with furnishings she rather liked, but despite the obvious expensive taste, there seemed to be odd assortments of knickknacks laying around in corners Regina wanted to desperately clean out.

 

“Just…. take her,” Regina snarled, handing over the crying baby with a sigh of relief. She couldn’t do this for much longer if her days were going to pan out like this. How many years did she have to wait for the saviour again?

 

Shaking her head at the ridiculous thought that she actually _wanted_ the curse to break, Regina took her belongings and headed upstairs to the master bedroom, one that was decorated to the finest of tastes. The room screamed Regina, although yet again, there seemed to be a litter of odd souvenirs across the dressing table and a few photographs hanging on the bare walls where she would have put frames of refined art on. Moving closer to inspect the black and white picture, Regina frowned at the sight of her own self looking so… _happy_ , and beside her was Snow, holding her around the waist and looking down at her lips while Regina smirked knowingly at the brunette whose hair was longer than it was now.

 

The picture in itself was innocent, it was a representative of their life together, of their supposed happiness that Regina now felt trapped in. There was nothing worse than living a lie that didn’t even belong to you.

 

Throwing herself on the bed, the dark queen lifted her eyes to the high ceiling and wished for everything to be a dream. She could use a little time trying to perfect the curse if that’s what it took, maybe even stop herself from taking a sleeping potion if this was what the new world she found herself in was made of.

 

Before long, her eyes had closed and the blissful state of darkness beckoned her closer.

 

Mary Margaret had successfully managed to sooth Emma after a diaper change and quick feed. Soon the babe was fast asleep and curling into a foetal position inside her cot while the unicorn mobile turned in its effort to provide a soothing backdrop of white noise. The entire attitude of her wife had made her forget how much she wanted Emma, or how much she wanted to see Regina beam with joy when she held her daughter. The comment about Emma not being hers— it a hurt to know that Regina was having difficulties with accepting the child she always wanted, but that, Mary Margaret supposed, was something Regina needed to sort out on her own.

 

Going in search of her wife to offer her some breakfast, Mary Margaret had to suppress a smile at the sight of the mighty mayor curled on her side with her hair in her face and one pant leg ridden up just over her knee. The brunette embodied a harmless kitten, and Mary Margaret had to supress the urge to pet her, instead, the pixie haired brunette slowly pulled off Regina’s shoes and covered the mayor with a light blanket before she tenderly moved dark locks away from a beautiful face and pressed a kiss to a cheek. No matter what, even if Regina was seeing someone else, Mary Margaret would always love Regina, and _that_ scary fact was what had her creep out of the room slowly and close the bedroom door behind her, the quiet house giving her ample time to _snoop._

She had made it through Regina’s study, finding nothing more interesting that town paperwork and a few handwritten notes about appointments when she moved on to the guestroom, knowing that was where Regina slept when they fought on occasion. The likelihood of finding something in a room half lived in was not going to be high, but besides her own bedroom, there was simply nowhere else to look.

 

Blowing out an exasperated sigh, Mary Margaret moved to the kitchen in search of a light breakfast. Perhaps she would resume her search with a clear head. Cracking two eggs in a heated pan, Mary Margaret watched the staple breakfast food cook with ease, and then plated them once she was satisfied with the sunny side eggs.

 

She used to enjoy having breakfast with Regina; in fact before Emma was born there had been lots of morning endeavours that ranged from simple kisses to coax another cup of coffee before work, to absolute mind blowing—

 

Mary Margaret coughed at her thoughts and took in deep breaths to rid herself of the blush that had crept up her cheeks. She was not a schoolgirl with a crush! But Regina had the ability to bring out the romantic side in her, a side she had thought long buried.

 

 

Upstairs, Regina stirred awake, barely enough to make out the grumbling in her stomach. The last she ate was some plastic tasting soup from the hospital and now she could smell eggs. Reaching out to the side of the bed, the former queen almost laughed at how easily her semi-conscious mind seemed to grab her phone, check the time and groan at the late hour.

 

If she stopped to think about it, then the entire scene was far too natural. Was her cursed self slowly taking over her mind? Would she live like this with Snow for the rest of her life, a baby in her arms and… then what? Stagnant time?

 

Rubbing her hands over her face, Regina turned over to the other side of the bed and tried to fight her hunger in favour of another few hours of sleep, hopefully one without memories or too deep thoughts that made her head spin. It seemed to last for a few minutes, until the familiar purple haze of the curse cloud enveloped her mind, another memory playing back like a recording in Regina’s broken personality.

 

_“We have to get up,” Mary Margaret urged, one leg wrapped around the mayor’s waist, the only thing separating them a sheet._

_“And why is that?” Regina asked, one naughty hand sliding down between them to plunge between slick folds yet again, making the woman beneath her gasp with pleasure_

_“I’m hungry,” Mary Margaret whined, shifting her hips just slightly to get a better angle on the delicious sensations her wife was making her feel, “I’m really,” a gasp, “_ really _hungry.”_

_A chuckle was the only thing she was met with before sinful lips descended down to join insistent fingers, content to simply let the brunette beg and plead while she enjoyed the attentions being given below her swollen belly._

_“Do you want me to stop then?” came a muffled question from underneath the sheet, ministrations pausing while the hand not trapped between pale thighs stroked a tender line across a pregnant swell._

_“Maybe pause for a bit? I won’t mind you doing whatever while I’m eating chicken stir-fry with a bearclaw for dessert.” Pushing the sheet down so that she could make out Regina’s eyebrow raise and huff of annoyance, Mary Margaret offered her wife a tender smile and pointed at her belly, “I want to keep going, but your daughter insists on food.”_

_Grumbling, Regina pressed a kiss to Mary Margaret’s stomach and pulled back just a little to offer the pixie-haired brunette a view of her very naked body. “I’m cooking for you like this,” She teased, removing herself from the bed while Mary Margaret struggled to follow her wife, intent on seeing the too serious mayor do something as scandalous as cook naked._

Apparently she wasn’t naked.

 

Just… how did she get here?

 

Blinking rapidly, Regina rubbed her eyes and looked at the figure in the kitchen, one fully clothed and making something that smelt delicious.

 

“Morning,” Snow greeted, leaning on the counter with a look of hesitance on her face

 

“I’ve seen you naked,” Regina whispered, although more to herself than to anyone else, and blushed crimson at the heat she felt travelling through her body at the memory.

 

“Yes you have, on several occasions, in multiple situations and under influence of the karma sutra. Now are hungry?” Waving the spatula at a bunch of vegetables she had on the stove to go along with her uneaten eggs, she watched as Regina’s confused expression gave way to a nod of approval.

 

“The baby?” Regina asked, walking into the kitchen while trying to pull her clothes into order. It wasn’t necessarily creased or haphazard, but Regina wanted to cover herself up from head to toe now knowing just exactly how good it felt to feel Snow’s fair skin pressed against hers. Everything between them seemed so _easy_ , and now she was ruining it for a revenge already sought.

 

A punishment of lies, she assumed, was what had been handed to her over the course of the two waking days she had been in the backward town, where the only misery she had witnessed had been _her own._

 

“In her crib sleeping,” Mary Margaret answered while plating up the vegetables. “I didn’t know you were awake so I didn’t make you any eggs, but I can make you some now if you want?”

 

Nodding an affirmative, Regina placed both her elbows on the counter and watched transfixed as the princess who could barely boil water was now moving carelessly across the kitchen as if she had been in it her entire life. Domestication it seemed, hit Regina where it hurt, and the fact that Snow had asked her what she wanted instead of _assuming_ made her want to cry at the fact that she mattered in the house.

 

Her pride wouldn’t allow her to submit to Snow so easily, but if she just let her queenly persona go in favour of the cursed one, then perhaps her punishment would work out to be a reward instead.

 

“Hey what’s wrong?” Mary Margaret asked once she looked up from her work, concerned eyes taking in the slouched posture of the usually immaculate brunette and the lone tear that trickled out from an onyx eye.

 

Abandoning her task, Mary Margaret rounded the counter separating her from Regina and engulfed the older woman an in embrace. Regina’s head came up to her chest, and her body stiffened against Mary Margaret’s, but after a few beats she could feel the sigh of defeat against her beating heart and that put her mind at ease.

 

She didn’t want to talk to Mary Margaret, in fact Regina wanted to be left alone to wallow like a spoiled child that didn’t get the right Christmas present, but instead she let herself melt in an embrace all too familiar and cursed herself for being so weak. It must be the exhaustion and hunger, she reasoned, lifting her hand up to fist in the cotton of Snow’s blouse, there was simply no other explanation for any of her behaviour besides the laws of the cursed town, her lack of energy and definitely not the white hot heat of the memory traveling through her veins as a reminder of how it felt to be loved and wanted.

 

“The food is burning,” She said softly, although reluctant to let go of the warm cocoon she found herself in.

 

In an instant, Mary Margaret had jumped back, taken the eggs off the stove and was glad she caught it just in time. “Breakfast, and then I think you need to rest, alright?” Stroking Regina’s cheek tenderly, she counted the fact that her wife didn’t flinch as a victory on her part and then passed the plate of food towards the mayor so that they could eat together.

 

Everything was normal, or as normal as it could have been, and Mary Margaret was willing to cut her losses for the sake of a happy family she envisioned since she said _‘I do’_ to the Mayor of all people.

 


	7. Day Plans

CHAPTER 6: DAY PLANS

 

* * *

 

THE DAY HAD GONE on without much bumps in the normality Regina tried to present while she gagged over the fact that she had hugged Snow White. It was weakness at its best, and she as the evil queen certainly didn’t need any love from a woman who had corrupted her life with ideals of motherhood being shoved down her throat.

 

After breakfast, a sorry excuse to regain some sleep and most of the day blacked out in the warm comforting bed that felt better than anything the enchanted forest had to hold, Regina only vaguely woke to register someone moving about the bedroom before blissful exhaustion called for her again. For someone so invested in a curse, Regina was certainly not enjoying any of it besides her bed that was probably getting a dent in it with her sleeping on one side so often, but alas, the call of her bladder had her begrudgingly wake to the sound of silence in the house.

 

The toilet was still a novelty, and Regina found herself sitting in there contemplating life, wondering what else she had to do to rid herself of the princess when her bottom had become far too numb to sit there doing nothing anymore. Toilet flushed and flushed again, Regina headed out of the bedroom and down the spiral staircase to see the baby in Snow’s lap, fast asleep.

 

There seemed to be a flicker of some sort and curiously, the once queen ventured closer to large seating area only to have her lips curl up in glee. She had read about mirrors being used as an entertainment device, but seeing it up close, with people speaking as if they couldn’t see her—a play on a small box, oh the delight!

 

A hand grasped her wrist from behind and Regina flinched at the touch, ready to burn down the person who had the audacity to disrupt her, but at the sight of Snow White looking worriedly at her with a baby in hand, Regina could only scowl at the action and remember that she had to play the part of a good wife. One who would in no uncertain terms destroy everything Snow held dear.

 

“Come sit. You haven’t eaten anything since breakfast, I could re-heat some food for you? Maybe bring you some of that tea you like?” Flopping down onto the leather couch, Regina took the child with little protest from Snow who handed her the baby like it was hers, and then thankfully disappeared to the kitchen.

 

Emma’s bottom lip immediately trembled and for some reason the brunette felt the need to prove herself to the woman who would only provide evidence of her _lack_ of motherly abilities as a good reason for war. Lifting the child to her chest, the mayor gently rubbed slow circles over the infant’s back and sighed out a breath of relief when the girl relaxed against her, clearly happy with the treatment. She had little knowledge on babies, but had seen a few elderly maids tend to visiting prince and princesses far too young to even hold their own crowns.

 

She could do this, have a child and be happy alone, maybe hire someone as a maid though; the house was large and a queen certainly did not clean.

 

A plate was laid out on the coffee table before her, jerking Regina out of her thoughts to come face to face with some vegetables and a piece of chicken. Peasant food. Wrinkling her nose in distaste, Regina pulled the girl tighter to her and stifled a sigh when she realised that sleeping for so long did in fact make one hungry, and if the simple food was all there was to eat, then she couldn’t very well complain (plus the princess cooked, what did she expect from a bandit anyway? Roast swan?).

 

Reluctantly placing the child closer to one hand, Regina freed up the other to haphazardly reach for the food while watching the scene unfold in front of her. It was some comedy she couldn’t name, and actually found herself smiling at the sass it entailed. Television it seemed was good for her soul.

 

It must have been hours later when she finally took stock of her surroundings to find the child gone along with Snow, and the food on the plate eaten. Her fingers were sticky with sauce, but the television kept rolling, and all Regina did was stick her fingers in her mouth to clean it off and kept laughing until she had settled into a better position on the couch to finish off the nap she left halfway.

 

Morning came with the chirping of birds, sunlight in her face and sticky sauce all over her fingers. Groaning, Regina stretched out her back and looked up at the ceiling so beautifully painted with the rays of sun that danced across the chandelier to create pretty patterns on the roof. So she had slept on the couch like a thrown out wet cat. To be fair, she had taken the bed the entire day and— was that _Emma?_

Grumbling, Regina moved from the couch up the spiral staircase and slouched against the doorframe signalling the entry into baby hell once the speed with which she took the stairs caught up to her fragile frame. “What’s all this fuss about?” She asked grumpily, pushing inside the nursery that shocked her pink. It was everywhere, pink crib, pink walls, and pink romper adorning the child beating against Snow’s chest in a way that suggested _murder._

Rubbing her sauce sticky fingers down her face, Regina grimaced at the feel of half licked digits that had painted her face with stale food; an action which only garnered the attentions of Mary Margaret who looked ready to throw the child at her and run.

 

“I tried everything!” Snow cried, bouncing the baby the refused to quieten, “She hates me!” _of course she does_ , Regina thought, wondering if she hadn’t given birth herself to the babe that seemed content to make Snow’s life a living hell, but remembering the infertility potion, the brunette could only purse her lips in annoyance.

 

“Give me a minute.” Closing the nursery door behind her because all that pink was giving her a headache, Regina went into the master bedroom, grunted at the unmade bed and headed straight for the en-suite bathroom to get rid of the sleep in her eyes. It didn’t take long for her to brush her teeth and wash the sauce of her hands and face before trudging back to the nursery to pluck the child from her nemesis hands—Emma only screamed more.

 

Upper lip curling into a snarl, Regina held the babe closer to her chest and tried to shush the girl, but nothing happened. The frustrating thing about the whole ordeal was that Snow was standing right there, judging her with those less than innocent eyes and why couldn’t her baby be good for one measly second?

 

“I think all this pink is making her fuss.” Good, a way to insult the princess and blame it on her without looking like a completely useless mother. “I’ll take her, just…” Regina wrinkled her nose in Snow’s direction, “clean up.” She didn’t wait to see Snow’s reaction before taking the wailing baby down to the living area, the vast space just enough for her to pace while rocking the child almost desperately.

 

“What is it that you want? Money? A curse for your enemy? Tell me and I’ll give you anything to make me look good in front of that brat.” Snapping at the child while holding her out in front of her chest, the most ridiculous thing happened: Emma blinked, bemused at her supposed mother, almost as if she were considering the bribe for a few measly seconds before bursting out into a new pitch altogether. Groaning out her frustration, Regina pulled Emma up to rest her tiny head on a strong shoulder and gently rubbed circles into her back, muttering as she paced about how misbehaved babies were.

 

It was only a few minutes later after pacing so much that she was beginning to count her steps, did Regina realise that among the wails she had begin to sing to the child, a child that was content to let her frantically sooth an already calm being that had taken to chewing on the collar of a shirt she had worn from the day before.

 

An eyebrow raised in disbelief, but from fear of ruining such a tender agreement, Regina only smiled when she heard Snow come rushing down the stairs, dressed in clothes far too embarrassing and pause mid step to take in the picture of a baby that obviously did hate her.

 

“Regina ar—“

 

“Hush, I’ve only just got her to calm down.” Oh Regina was enjoying toying with Snow like this, it felt _naughty_ almost to have her run towards an affection that would never be there. Perhaps this punishment was turning out to be a reward instead. “I’ll put her down in her carrier in the meantime, and then we’re going out.”

 

“Oh?” Snow asked, that sickly sweet voice grating on Regina’s ears, “where are we going?”

 

“Oh not you, dear,” Regina purred, still rubbing circles into Emma’s back, “Emma and I. You can stay at home and do… well, whatever it is you do.” The dismissal was clear, and the crestfallen features of one Mary Margaret was good enough revenge for her to feel celebratory enough to have an extra long shower.

 

It had taken her the better part of an hour to get ready, what with learning the intricacies of a blow dryer, an iron and the makeup she usually had people apply for her, but Regina had always been a quick learner and had it relatively down in after a few attempts.

 

Once satisfied, Regina grabbed the obnoxious pink bag meant for Emma, and then the carrier with Emma herself to stomp down the stairs with as much grace as she could muster despite the weight on both of her hands slowly bringing her down to the same eye level as the floor. “You’re leaving now?” Snow asked, making Regina roll her eyes at the clinginess she hated from the time she knew the woman.

 

“I told you didn’t I?”

 

“But aren’t you going to have breakfast? And Dr Whale said you needed at least a week of rest. You’re looking pale already.” Snow reached out her hand to touch it to Regina’s forehead, but the older brunette simple jerked away in irritation. “Fine, I’ll take Emma to Granny’s.”

 

“Where are you going?” At this point Regina was sure her eyes were going to roll to the back of her head and stick there, but before she could turn the handle to the front door, Regina shouted out a quick, “cemetery,” and muttered a, “to search for your burial site, _”_ under her breath. Honestly, how much more could she take?

 

She wasn’t cleared to drive yet, but she figured the walk with Emma in her pram would be enough exercise, especially since she had found the contraption in the garage and spent another fifteen minutes fighting with the damn thing. There was no way in hell she wasn’t going to use the life out of it until it cried mercy.

 

Strolling down main street, Regina nodded to those who mattered (which was no one) and made it to Granny’s in one piece to ask for her usual pancakes and coffee, although there posed the problem when she looked down at the child and wondered what to get for her. What did new-borns eat anyway?

 

Sensing her distress, Granny merely pointed to the bottle attached to the side of Emma’s bag and Regina could only breathe out a sigh of relief once the plastic nipple quietened the child’s gurgling. Good, now she could have her breakfast in peace while being away from Snow. She certainly didn’t need another episode of the night before, and already the questions were brewing as to why she had allowed something like that to happen.

 

Was it the memories? The unguarded affection that her cursed self apparently held for one Snow White? What if one day she woke to find that the cursed memories were all the memories she held? No, no, no, she couldn’t handle that. How would she make Snow suffer with good morning kisses and back rubs?

 

Eating in anger as she tried to figure out the workings of the curse, Regina had quickly emptied her plate, and now sat daintily sipping from her cup of steaming coffee. There was a newspaper at the corner of her table, one she deliberated picking up to read, but before she could, a body slid into the booth across from her, and a rough familiar accent reached her ears. “Madame mayor.”

 

Eyes lifting to meet a ruggedly handsome face, Regina let her lips curl into a slow smile. Now this was a face she wouldn’t mind waking up to each morning (for reasons other than commitment of course.) “Sheriff Graham, _my my_ , do you look dashing today.” Coffee cup set down, hand idly patting Emma’s stomach when she began to fuss, and her eyes practically eating Graham up alive, she didn’t see Snow enter the diner and gasp in response to the almost flirtatious picture she posed.

 

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I have made a schedule to update every Wednesday, which might mean shorter chapters but quicker updates, although I'm sure all of them will be roughly the same length as this chapter. Thank you all for reading though! All the comments, Kudos and bookmarks really give me motivation to keep this story going!


	8. Graveyard Visits

CHAPTER 7: GRAVEYARD VISITS

 

* * *

  

MARY MARGARET STOOD unmoving, watching the scene play out in front of her with widened eyes. So she had been correct in the assumption, which would explain the late nights, the scalding attitude, and excuses to see the sheriff for long hours at a time to _apparently_ discuss budgets and flood protocol.

 

The wallet Regina had left behind was clutched so tightly in her grip she was sure she was leaving indentations on the expensive leather, but how could she care about a measly wallet when her wife had dismissed her in favour of some ruggedly handsome man that had too kind eyes to actually hate— but oh could Mary Margaret _try_.

 

Stalking over to her wife and child that hadn’t put up much of a fuss besides when Regina removed her hand from Emma’s stomach, the teacher on maternity leave had half the mind to slam the wallet on the table— or better yet, just leave without Regina having any money on her to pay for breakfast she wasn’t even invited to in the first place; but from the looks of things that would only provide ample opportunity to showcase Graham’s gentlemanly skill if he pulled out a few bills and tossed it on the table. Mary Margaret was certainly not going to let the sheriff get the upper hand, not when she was a formidable foe.

 

“Regina,” She greeted, causing the brunette to look up at her in shock, “You forgot your wallet at home, and I know Granny is a little stingy on the tabs.” Cutting in before Regina can ask her what she was doing here, Mary Margaret handed the accessory over and smoothly slid into the booth opposite her wife, pushing Graham further in to squash him against the ugly flower wallpaper.

 

“So Sheriff Graham, how’s work been?” Mary Margaret asked, smiling sweetly at the man despite his uncomfortable demeanour. Who could possibly be angry at her while being so insufferably sweet? She certainly didn’t intend to harm the man— not _intentionally_ at least, but she did want to show Regina how bad the decision to cheat on her had been with a few extra jabs to the right places.

 

“Its, uh…” Graham looked to Regina to who had a bewildered look on her face, her hand stilling over the baby’s stomach as the child tried to unsuccessfully reach for it, “Going okay, nothing unusual to report.” Nodding slowly, Graham shifted a little more until he cleared his throat, having had his fill of Mary Margaret staring down at him as if she would produce an axe to cut off his head in a near rage he couldn’t quite decipher. “I better get going, my patrol is starting in a few minutes.” Standing to awkwardly gesture between them, Graham managed to angle himself out so that Mary didn’t even have to move, instead keeping her eyes pointedly focused on the shiny ring that glinted under the table, one being handled by Emma who looked enamoured with the rock set inside the silver band.

 

She was furious, and Regina only looked to match it. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

 

Mary Margaret was ready for the inquisition, but it still hurt to think that her own wife blew her off for breakfast, especially for a man as cowardly as Graham. “You forgot your wallet at home, and I know how Granny is about keeping tabs.” If she was being honest, then Mary Margaret would admit that Regina being mayor could have managed to weasel her way into a settled bill by the end of the day, but the wallet was an excuse to see her wife, to spend some quality time with her.

 

It had been so long, longer than she could remember when they had properly sat down and spoke about their hopes and dreams, their lives that had now faded into some sort of dull relationship she had never envisioned for them. She had just given birth to a baby and yet, the happiness from that child was lost in a void of anger that Regina had suddenly developed and was now throwing at her with no plausible excuse.

 

“Fine, you brought the wallet, now leave.” The words from Regina’s mouth sounded tired, strained as if she was holding something back, and if Mary Margaret had her memories of Snow White, she would know the twitch in her dear stepmother’s neck meant that she was only restraining herself from a fatal blow to end the princess’s life, but alas, the school teacher was oblivious and simply reached across to grab for Regina’s hand.

 

“I love you, I hope you know that.” Regina could only jerk her hand out of the hold, knowing that whatever Snow said it was all a lie, everything fabricated by the curse to serve as some sort of sick prison for the crimes against the innocent. How could she live the rest of her days with this woman loving her for being a kind and caring Mayor when in fact she was nothing but a ruthless evil queen? The short amount of back-chatting Snow had received was nothing compared to her on a usual day. In fact, the past two days had been nothing more than a blessing if Snow was concerned.

 

“I have errands to run. If you’re so concerned about Emma, then you can keep her.” Snow hadn’t mentioned Emma, in fact the idiot seemed almost too willing to trust her with the child that she hoped wasn’t the saviour. Nevertheless, Regina felt suffocated by too many emotions that seemed misplaced, that seemed _undeserving._

Her exit was blocked by a skimpy waitress pushing two plates of pancakes in front of the pair, the previously ordered breakfast finally arriving. She had thought that some time with Graham would make her feel normal again, help her stop the horrible cursed memories from changing who she really was, but alas, Snow stared across from her and pointed at the pancakes with something akin to scary determination in her eyes.

 

A low rumble of her stomach, and Regina resigned herself to an uncomfortable silence while she forked pancake into her mouth and sipped on a second cup of coffee.

 

***

 

Regina looked around her vault. Nothing seemed out of place, everything was where it needed to be and she was almost sure of it. Walking through the echoing hallways of the stone structure, the former queen checked every room and made sure it still held its respected pieces. She only paused when Daniel’s preserved body came into view, his face that of a sleeping teen now far younger than she.

 

The doors to his resting place were closed before the tears could fall, before she could imagine what life would have been like had she successfully ran away with the man who captured her tender heart at such a fragile state.

 

She found the curse scroll hidden away in the box among other trinkets, the red fabric parting for her nimble fingers as they pulled the parchment open. The dried ink stared at her with the same words she had read before. Nothing but the incantation and ingredients greeted her. Useless, utterly useless!

 

After wrangling her way out of that breakfast, Regina thought the fruits of her labour would produce better results, but instead, all she got was… time alone it seemed, which was far better than having to spend it with a suddenly clingy Snow White who insisted on accompanying her to wherever. It was only after she yelled at the woman, informing her that the destination was her father’s grave, did she relent just a little and offered to take Emma back home.

 

The cemetery it seemed, they both agreed, was no place for a child.

 

_Regina had gone there as a dare, she couldn’t remember why she had thought it would be a good idea, but at the time creeping into the cemetery at night was worth it for her pride. The crying echoing throughout the misty grounds was another matter, however. Regina was about to turn back when the outline of a dress came into view, her curiosity making her walk forwards despite her mind screaming at her to run._

_“Whose there?!” The shriek that came from her mouth sounded distant, the movement from the other figure having her tremble with fear she had never felt before. Could this be the end of the famed Regina Mills? Dead at the hands of a Ghost only 18 years old?_

_“It’s just me,” The voice answered, a tiny thing still hiccupping with cries. “I’m sorry… my mother s-she’s-” The sorry excuse of an explanation was cut off with more sobbing, calling to Regina’s soft side as she bent at the waist tentatively to make sure this girl was real._

_Once her finger poked into the brunette’s shoulder, she relaxed her stance just a little .“You shouldn’t be here so late at night.”_

_“Then what are **you** doing here?” Despite the hiccups, the voice still sounded accusatory, and it took all of Regina not to laugh._

_“A dare,” she answered softly. “You should be at home, anyone could find you out here and then…” She shuddered, thinking of the horrors she had read about in newspapers, and the things her family had relayed should she decide to wander off on her own. It simply wasn’t safe._

_“Daddy doesn’t care anymore, and Mama… she’s—” A fresh wave of tears had Regina crouch down to peer at the headstone, her eyebrows lifting up at the name scrawled elegantly into the stone. **EVA BLANCHARD**. Her mother hated the woman, she had heard so many tales of her and a supposedly innocent daughter too naïve, but she had been sent out of town for studies before Regina could form any solid memories of her._

_“Shh, don’t cry. Your mother wouldn’t want to see you so upset now would she? She would want you to draw strength from her memory and become someone you both can be proud of, now let’s go before we get arrested by the sheriff for trespassing.”_

_One longing look to Eva’s grave and the girl slipped her hand in Regina’s, content to entrust her life to a stranger with flowing locks and kind eyes. “I’m Mary Margaret. I arrived yesterday… I’ll be going to the school over here. Daddy says it would be better if I was closer to him rather than at my old school.”_

_“Then we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other.” A small smile had Mary Margaret mirror her own, at least the girl had one friend. Moving and adjusting wasn’t easy for anyone, but Regina had a feeling that there would be more of their story to tell._

She woke with a start, the purple fog from her mind still making her hazy, but not enough for her to recognise the pain in her neck from sleeping at an awkward angle. Memories from when they were dating, when Snow was pregnant, and now from when they were _teenagers?_ Did the curse have their entire life mapped out to be together? Nothing made sense.

 

Frustration built up inside of her, the fog disappearing to have her in full senses and ready to charge angrily at something. Why she was angry, Regina didn’t know, but she did know that her revenge was being replaced by kindness and love that didn’t belong in her memories. She was going to go mad, and there was nothing that could stop it, not unless she resigned her days to spending her time down in the vault until the saviour rolled into town. No, the evil queen was a fighter, and this time would be no different.

 

Throwing the cursed scroll across the room in blind fury, Regina pushed herself up from the position she found herself in and glowered at the broken metal that had come apart from the scroll. No matter what it did to her, it still worked in some way didn’t it?

 

Picking up the pieces tenderly, a small rolled up parchment slipped out from inside the scroll, its yellowed edges telling her of the age it was written, one that certainly wasn’t in line with the curse itself.

 

_“You haven’t cast a curse, not when its happiness you seek. Have you found the magic? Let it lead your defeat. A twisted realm you shall find, be it by worry, faith or time. Break it and you shall see, not everything is meant to be.”_

Her eyebrow rose at the cryptic words, her mind already rushing to fit the pieces together to try and work out what went wrong. Was this a message? A warning? A little fine print that she hadn’t been told of before she cast the curse?

 

Fumbling with the scroll, she pushed everything back where it belonged in her vault, and left to Gold’s shop with the little parchment balled up in the fist of her hand.

 

***

 

“What is this?” Regina asked, slamming the door behind her to have the bell jingle merrily. She hated that damn bell.

 

“Madame Mayor,” Gold responded, a smart grin on his mouth, one she wanted to punch off. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

 

Regina barely made it to the counter before the parchment was slammed down on the glass cabinet, Gold’s eyebrow only raising in response. “Read it,” she barked, stepping back just slightly to prevent herself from breaking anything within the shop.

 

Gold’s beady eyes read through the parchment, once, twice, and then again for good measure before looking up at her with a frown. “What do you want me to make of this Madame Mayor?” He looked genuinely confused, and _that_ for a second threw Regina off. She needed the man to remember, but this was also his town, and if he didn’t see her fit for office…

 

“Never mind. You can pretend all you want Gold, but I know you too well. Something like this?” she snatched the paper out of his hands, her eyebrow raising in challenge, “Wont let you rest for too long.”

 

The sound of the bell behind her was all that was left once she strode down the street, question upon question making her dizzy with no answers.

 

She had cast the curse, she had found a twisted realm, there was some sort of magic warping her memories to fit the picture it wanted to paint of her, but _break it and you shall see, not everything is meant to be?_ What in the word did that mean? Perhaps it warned her against breaking the curse, perhaps she had to do everything in her power to keep its balance. Yes, she could do that, she could play along if it meant that the citizens of the small town wouldn’t run after her with pitchforks and daggers in the middle of the night.

 

But what if it _did_ break?

 

There seemed to be only one solution available. Make Snow White love her to the point that the memories she might think was cursed, actually affect her judgement if it did break. As far as Regina knew, she already had one foot in the door, now all she needed to do was play her cards right and Snow White would be putty in her hands trying to fend off those vying for her head.

 


	9. False Promises

A/N: Long chapter ahead! be warned! Anyways, thank you all for your kudos, comments and bookmarks, it really means a hell of a lot!

* * *

 

**Chapter 8: False promises**

Her stomach was aching from having two plates of pancakes: one from her own order at Granny's that morning, and another when Graham had accidentally ordered for them again; his pea brain getting in the way of his manners at the sight of her with a child and a few flirtatious suggestions.

Clutching her stomach as she walked from Gold's shop to her mansion, Regina knew that the growing list of pains would now include her feet. Not yet cleared to drive, the mayor had opted to have Mary Margaret drop her off at the cemetery and then pick her up when she called, but now that she had paid a surprise visit to Gold Regina supposed the walk would provide her the opportunity to admire the town she created without Snow badgering on about something mundanely unimportant.

A stroll down Main Street had her admire the various shops with ironic patrons tending to the counters. There was Sneezy owning a pharmacy, and Little Red as a waitress, not to mention the imp who owned a store for all his little possessions that no one would purchase. If it weren't for a wife and child, Regina would have thought her creation quite the inside joke.

She rounded Mifflin Street far too quickly, but the sight of her grand house had her sigh. It looked a type of home that was happy, one that held so many expectations she was always going to fall short of. It was her job after all, the evil queen causing destruction, and Snow in this reality was irritatingly naïve. She held belief and faith without question, she was soft and sheltered in her approach, yet there had been flickers of strength in her attitude when it came to the queen's health. Such affection scared Regina, but she knew that if the curse were to stay in tact then she needed to approach situations with caution.

A few days playing house, maybe a dwindling of interest like Leopold had done with her over time, and then she would take Gold up on his offer for that divorce that would break Snow's heart in half. The separation would be subtle, it would be natural to the curse, and that was all Regina needed for it to stay tentatively intact for the rest of her existence.

Satisfied with her course of action, Regina let a pout form on her lips as if tasting the air. It tasted like victory, one that would be properly seduced in a setting against the princess who thought herself too innocent.

"Regina? I thought I was going to pick you up?" The frown of concern had Regina nearly gag, but the gurgling baby in her arms had her offer a small tentative smile instead.

"I needed the walk" It was curt and to the point, but the tone was slightly softer since her attention was directed at the child whose face was pressed against Snow's shoulder, her eyes sparkling at the woman she ought to be afraid of.

"Did you…" Snow trailed off, the question hanging between them as she stepped aside to let Regina take off her coat. At the raise of Regina's eyebrows, Snow cleared her throat and gently ran her hand down the mayor's arm instead.

"Did I what?" Regina prompted, too tired to play guessing games with the girl, not when her attention had shifted so beautifully to the child she took from Snow's hands without permission.

As usual, Emma began bawling, her head thrown back and Regina looking as if she had just killed something dear to the babe that only quietened down when Snow rubbed the infant's back.

"Get what you needed done?" The tail end of Snow's question had Regina look up and sigh, thoughts of the extra scroll causing a dark look to cross her features before it disappeared with the mayor who moved further into the house. She had to be careful now, there was no need to come on too strongly when all she wanted to do was tear her own hair out in frustration.

"I did. What's it-" _to you_. Cutting herself off from a biting remark, Regina internally groaned, subjecting herself to the knowledge that being nice to Snow was not going to be easy. "I visited my father's grave. It was his death day … a few days ago" Tears instantly sprung to her eyes, the sad emotion being blocked by Emma's hand that was trying to reach for her nose.

In the midst of dealing with Snow White, Regina had forgotten about the man that sacrificed himself for her happiness, one that ended up being hell in a time loop. His lifeless eyes would haunt her forever, she knew that now, but the shock of such a realisation, of the bitter knowledge that she herself had taken his life… it was deafening.

Swallowing thickly, Regina slowly let herself sink down onto the dining room chair, the stiff wooden back helping her keep her posture when all she wanted to do was sag down into something soft.

"I'm sorry" She heard, Snow's voice beside her, a soft hand on her arm "Is there anything I can do?"

Shaking her head in the negative at the offer, Regina glanced up at the clock. She still had almost half the day left to figure out how to navigate the curse and possibly reverse the unorthodox affect to her life, but how could she concentrate now?

A hiccup from the baby followed by a small cry had her bounce the child on instinct, Emma's cries quietening almost instantly, but her discomfort could still be felt despite her calm demeanour

"I have to feed her" Snow whispered softly, reaching across to take Emma out of Regina's hold, careful not to break the soft trance the mayor seemed to be in.

If Mary Margaret looked close enough, she could almost see the wife she knew lurking beneath sad eyes and an aggressive downturn of her lips.

"I'll be in the nursery if you need me, okay?" Hesitating, Mary Margaret stood in front of Regina, but after a beat of silence, she leant down to press a tender kiss to her wife's forehead, one that earned her a bemused look. One small victory perhaps?

* * *

Regina wiped absently at her forehead for what seemed like the hundredth time. She had been doing that for the last hour, her eyes reading and rereading the scroll to try and decrypt the message she knew lay hidden between the folds of the curse. If she cracked this puzzle, then everything else would fall into place, and the only way to do that was to have a clear head.

Unfortunately for her, such things were nothing more than a fantasy.

Snow was different in this realm, her care sincere and genuine, but no- this was a curse realm, and any sort of affection she would receive fell almost ridiculously over the line of **fake.**

Flopping down onto the leather chair in her home office, Regina reached behind her to scratch at her neck, her skin becoming itchy with irritation that she simply didn't have time to wash away. If there was no escaping the punishment of her curse, then there was only one option left: waiting for the saviour. And Regina couldn't very well twiddle her thumbs for the next twenty eight years.

Even so, her supposed _family_ would never leave the loop, Emma would be a newborn for as long as the curse was intact, and as much as Regina loved children, she honestly didn't know how much she would be able to take waking up at odd hours and changing diapers almost constantly. Already in the last hour she had fussed and moaned while being roped in for one of those. It was one of the lowest points in her life, but Snow had been otherwise occupied and Regina was left with a stinky bottom to clean and a giggling baby at her apparently very amusing facial expressions. Needless to say, the once queen wasn't going to stand around and do nothing when the consequences for keeping Snow around included horrendous tasks such as those.

Rubbing at her temples, Regina let her mind drift, the relaxing motion allowing her to take a breath and pretend for one small moment that she was back in her castle, her victory within grasp and Snow was still _Snow_. No sudden affectionate changes, no crying baby that hated her, no… no loop in some sort of twisted reality that had her muscles clench from stress.

"We need to talk"

_Oh no._

Was her imagination skills so good that she could hear Snow's voice as clear as day too? Those words so very like the princess that believed there to be good in her stepmother. Ha! Stepmother! One good thing that would come out of the entire ordeal would be Snow's face if she got her memories back. Such a scandalous affair that even Prince Charming wouldn't be able to ignore.

"Regina" She heard again, cracking one eye open to see Snow leaning over her desk, cleavage on full display, and concern in her eyes.

"What?" The mayor responded, one eyebrow raised in annoyance.

"We need to talk. I know you've had a hard day, but I can't… I just…" Looking flustered and slightly out of breath, Snow crossed her arms over herself and looked Regina in the eyes, the other woman only lowering her hands from her temples to cross them neatly over her thighs.

"Then talk" gesturing to the chair opposite her, the desk between them, Regina let out a tired sigh and hoped it wasn't something that was a waste of her time – like what colour the walls of their kitchen should be next. If Snow suggested yellow...

Clenching her fist to keep her anger at bay, one that came with Snow White whether she wanted it or not, Regina braced herself for this version's words to fill the room.

"Are you… I mean" Glancing up at Regina, Mary Margaret sat down gingerly on the chair offered, thinking that it would be much better if they had the conversation somewhere more comfortable, but she would take what she could get.

"Emma's asleep" She said instead, her courage disappearing when she saw Regina narrow her eyes and pout like she always did when she was angry. Mary Margaret honestly didn't know what she had done wrong in the last few days besides be herself, give birth to Emma and then… then Regina changed.

"Are you having an affair?" There, it was out in the open because how could she live without knowing anymore? Did she even want to know in the first place? Perhaps not, but if Regina told her what she wanted, how their relationship with another person in it now was supposed to be handled, then Mary Margaret would do everything in her power to adjust, to make her wife happy again.

The question threw Regina off guard, had her eyes widen and eyebrows raise with nothing short of an amused expression slipping over her shocked mask. An affair? My, was Snow White a jealous one!

A chuckle escaped her lips before she could help it, her head tilting to the side to regard Snow with something akin to affection, before she snapped out of it, the familiar tingle of that damned purple fog lurking in the corner of her mind. She couldn't deal with another memory, not now, not when she had this small little thing she could tug and pull at until it gave way to misery from her nemesis.

"Whatever would make you think that, dear?" The small amused smile lingered on her lips, one that only grew at the hurt expression on Snow's face from that simple line. Was it the _dear_ that was so blatantly a masked insult, or was it the fact that Regina did not deny nor confirm the accusation?

"You… well you've been acting differently as of late, and I just had Emma, maybe I'm not as desirable to you… maybe Emma was too much" Shrugging her shoulders with a frown on her face, Mary Margaret looked nearly on the verge of tears. She had expected screaming and insults, but this calm sort of talk that only served to mock her was more humiliating than she had accounted for.

"Have you _ever_ been-" Swallowing the insult, the verbal confirmation that she did _not_ in fact find Snow desirable, Regina ran her fingers over her lips and curled them beneath her chin. This was the perfect opportunity to show a neutral front, to let the princess believe that she was one hundred percent committed, but… her expertise in the area of anything remotely affectionate bordered on either entirely too possessive, or highly sexualised.

"I'm… sorry" Choking the word out, because she had never thought she would say that to Snow White of all people, Regina stood from her chair and smoothed her blazer over "I'm having a hard time" The brunette admitted, her voice hard and too sweet at the same time "With the baby, and you… I just feel out of sorts. Once I get my footing, I'm sure we can get back to where we were" And then Snow's crushed heart would rest in the palm of her hand like always planned.

Standing up too, Mary Margaret gave Regina a terse nod, noting that the apology did not signify for whether Regina had been having an affair, or for her behaviour that had been radical since she had come home with Emma. "I'm going to make us some lunch" Brushing past her wife, Mary Margaret's jaw clenched together, the talk making her angrier for some inexplicable reason.

Pulling out a few ingredients, Mary Margaret thought long and hard about Regina, the way she stood, how hard her eyes were. She looked as if she was constantly hurting, battling something within herself that she simply didn't want to let go of. _Her_ Regina would have reacted to such an accusation far differently. She would have given Mary Margaret her full and undivided attention, lead her to the loveseat by the bookshelf and taken her hands perhaps. There would have been physical contact, there would have been soft eyes and a kind smile. Regina would have frowned at her words instead of looking amused, she would have kissed her tenderly and told her what a fool she was being for even thinking of something so obscene. _I have eyes only for you,_ Mary Margaret remembered Regina say once, and at the time she had believed it, she had believed her up until a few days ago.

The last time they had engaged in any sort of affection was the day after Mary Margaret had brought Emma home. She remembered kissing Regina in the morning, so very happy to have their baby in their nursery and to celebrate that with her wife, but even _that_ had been forced.

A sad sigh passed her lips, the lettuce she was chopping for their salad butchered like her thoughts. Could Regina truly have fallen out of love with her in one day?

* * *

Lunch was an excruciatingly silent affair, Mary Margaret having nearly bullied Regina into eating at least something or lest she call Doctor Whale and have him stick a tube down her throat. A reluctant agreement had them both sitting at the dinning room table, their forks clacking against the plates whilst they ate their pasta.

"I'm not your mother, you know" Mary Margaret said quietly, twirling her food around her fork to drop it down into her plate again.

"Excuse me?" Regina asked, head snapping up to regard the princess that dare speak to her in such a way.

"I said" Mary Margaret bit out, dropping her fork into her plate and pushing it away entirely "I am not your mother" Fists clenched and nostrils flared, Mary Margaret tried to tame her anger, but every time she thought about Regina's behaviour, she only got angrier. "I have given birth a month earlier than expected, subjected myself to extreme pain to bring our child into this world- and don't think for a second that I don't love her, because I do, so much, but I'm in _pain_ , I was in hospital, and I have to breast feed a small child or else I begin to hurt. I cannot be babying you _and_ Emma. I cannot force you to eat your food, or worry about what might set you off the next time we speak!"

Regina was livid, she was ready to reach out and snap the princess's neck, but her words of protest were blocked by Snow continuing her tirade, the magic she sought no longer within her grasp.

"And you having an affair?! How idiotic do you think I am?"

_Very,_ Regina grunted in her head, but was pulled back to the yelling, and whispered screeching that had her head ache.

"You want to be married to me, then damn well act like my wife! If you no longer want to remain shackled to me, then by all means, find a way to get out. There's the door" pushing her chair back, Mary Margaret escaped the heavy situation by instead climbing up the stairs, her heavy footfalls getting lighter the further away she went from Regina.

As for the mayor? Well, all she could do was rest her chin on her closed fist and breathe in deeply, trying to quell the raging bull that dared her to go up there and strangle the princess for speaking to her in such a way, but on the other end, Regina hadn't expected this Mary Margaret to have so much fire in her. It made her want to laugh and jump for joy that something hadn't changed, that there was a sliver of hope for her sanity after all.

Gathering up the plates, Regina took them to the kitchen and set them on the counter, looking around at the appliances that seemed unfamiliar, yet the knowledge she needed about such things like the fridge came easily without much thought. One thing the curse had gotten right then.

Was Snow's fire a sign of the curse weakening or was it just a genuine reaction to her behaviour?

Why should she even care anyways? Snow being miserable was exactly what she wanted from this entire dilemma, but self preservation had always trumped that.

A begrudging sigh left her lips as she ascended the stairs, her hand gently sliding up the railing as she moved, one step at a time until she had reached the landing, pausing at the closed bedroom door that held a sniffling woman inside.

" _I'm sorry" Regina said, leaning against the door, her palm pressed flat against it "It was a stupid thing to say, and I will never ever doubt you again" Banging her forehead on the white painted wood, Regina could only wait for the sniffling inside the bedroom to pause just slightly, signifying that Mary Margaret was indeed listening to her._

" _I was gone so long, I… saw you with her, I thought… I thought you didn't want me anymore." All she could do was blink as she lay out her insecurities, feeling vulnerable and exposed, just the same way her mother had_ _ **never**_ _taught her to be. "And she's pretty, prettier than me, younger too. You have so much in common with her, and ever since I went to college, I feel like we don't connect as well… Like I'm boring" Her voice had ebbed into a strained whisper, one that was met with the cold rush of air from Mary Margaret finally opening the door to allow her in._

" _You're an idiot to think I would like anyone but you."_

" _You're an idiot to like only me. You deserve so much better" Tenderly reaching out to cup Mary Margaret's cheek, Regina slid her hand down to brush away the stain of tear tracks. "Look at you… I did this, I'm so sorry" Tears of her own beaded at her lashes, ready to drop, but at Mary Margaret's soft sigh and gentle arms around her waist, Regina could only melt into the embrace._

" _I do deserve someone as caring as you, but there's no need to be jealous. I have eyes only for you" Cupping Regina's cheeks, Mary Margaret looked into those pools of brown and pleaded with her silently._ Please, believe me.

" _I have eyes only for you" Regina repeated, remembering the first time she had said that to the girl, how she had blushed and giggled before they went back to their respective classes, their mild crushes back then now grown into this wonderful thing._

" _Don't you trust me?" Mary Margaret inquired, hurt lacing her features once more._

" _I don't trust_ _ **her**_ _. She was touching you, and flirting, and- and who wouldn't? You're so beautiful" Regina didn't get to finish her rambling, her lips pressed to pale ones that held her down in their grasp. Unable to deny herself any longer, the older brunette let her hands coil around Mary Margaret's waist, walking them backwards until they were safely inside the room._

" _I missed you so much. You were gone for too long. How many more years of this must I endure?" Dramatic as always, Mary Margaret fell down onto her bed, a soft airy laughter falling from her lips now that she was appeased._

" _A few more years, my love" Regina answered back, crawling on top of the younger girl "And then you will leave for college and I will be left in a similar state that you are"_

_Brushing back a few locks of hair that had escaped from Regina's ponytail, Mary Margaret looked into her girlfriend's eyes seriously, a promise on her lips "But as long as you remember that I love you, everything will be fine. We will work through anything that comes our way, yes?"_

" _Yes" Regina agreed, her lips claiming Mary Margaret's again through another giggle that eased their serious words._

Snapping back to reality, Regina pressed her palm against the bedroom door, her breath quick and heartbeat steady. A whole life this curse had created, twisted to meet her current reality, and each time a new piece was revealed, she would almost stagger backwards with the force of what felt like love flowing through her veins for the girl she hated with every fibre of her being. Still, the purple fog from the curse had her dizzy enough to act on instinct, had her push open the bedroom door and stand there with her eyes trained on Snow.

"I'm sorry" She said softly "I… I just feel lost. I don't know what's happening anymore, how to act, or behave. Everything is so out of control that I-" Choking on her words, Regina shook her head from side to side, clearing her mind from the weakness that had overtaken her.

Snow lifted her head up from her hands, tears streaking down her face, a confused look crossing her features before the sobs she had been stifling came out in full force. "I-I'm sorry too" She hiccuped, swiping underneath her eyes "I think it's the h-hormones, or… I'm so sorry"

Seeing Snow in such a state should have made her curl inwards with delight, but instead, with the curse in mind, Regina sat beside the princess and gently stroked her back "Its alright, we all make mistakes" One she too had made upon entry into the room. If the curse memories had such a great effect on her, then she only dreaded to think what would happen as the days went on.

_I have to stay strong_ , she thought, curling her fingers around Snow's shoulder as the other woman leaned into her, fingers clutching at the collar of her shirt while the silk stained with tears. _I have to remember who I am or else._

* * *

The rest of the day went by without much incident, their silence being filled with tending to Emma, and what Regina later learnt was scheduled shows that stared at a certain time and ended a bit later. She decided that she liked the routine, the reward to the end of the day that would consist of a bit of entertainment, supper, and then bed.

Supper was an issue. She had spent too long trying to figure out how to work the stove, and then to add to the fact that she didn't know how to cook anyways. Snow had come in after feeding Emma for the umpteenth time that day and only laughed at her attempts to follow a recipe. In the end Regina had managed to pull out a semi-edible dish that was simple enough to make.

The radio was switched on when they both moved to the kitchen, soapy water between them as one washed and the other dried, Regina's eyes nearly bulging at the fact that she had to do something so mundane. She had almost complained that queens don't indulge in peasant work, but when Snow informed her that they hadn't anyone else to do it, and the dirty dishes would only invite in pests, Regina had grudgingly taken up a dishtowel and got acquainted with the cupboards of their kitchen.

The real problem, however, was after Emma had been given a bath, changed, and fed again. Regina was faced with a dilemma that put her in a corner, and Regina most certainly did not like corners.

"She's down for the next two hours at least" Nodding her acknowledgement at Snow about Emma's update, she watched as the woman moved around the room seamlessly, picking up a pyjama set and laying out on the bed. A bed they were supposed to _share._

"So did you?" The younger brunette asked, Regina snapping her head to look Snow who seemed preoccupied.

"Do what?" The mayor asked, standing awkwardly in the middle of the room, her hands clasped in front of her

"Have an affair" Ah, back to that then?

The idea to taunt Snow rose like a hot fire in her belly, something twisted and sadistic that had her smirk dangerously "And what would you do if I did?" She asked, pulling off her blazer to fold it over the back of the chaise, a book left open on it.

"I…" Turning to face Regina, Mary Margaret frowned at the question, but then put herself in the situation, thinking to just what she would do if the suspicion was confirmed that her wife was in fact having an affair.

"I would be very upset, I would… I would do something drastic probably, like set fire to your car, perhaps throw your clothes out of the window and change the locks in the house. I would do everything in my power to hurt you back the same way you hurt me" It seemed fair, but the casual way in which such things were said had Regina grip the chaise to steady herself.

"I haven't had an affair" The older brunette answered honestly, her eyes roaming over Snow's figure, one still fit and roughed from the woods, but the slight tummy she could see told tales of the child she bore, one that hadn't quite made it to the cursed town. Perhaps the child really was gone, perhaps this princess would come and break her curse, but until then, she had all the time in the world to get comfortable in the life that seemed rather fitting for the famed evil queen.

How many can say they had their nemesis under their thumb, had them ache for the other, love them in such chaotic ways that the storm around them stopped for a few moments. Perhaps she could have it all, perhaps the way to achieve true victory was not to play along with the curse, but rather twist it to her will.

"I don't like to cuddle" Regina blurted out, watching carefully the emotions on Snow's face, waiting to see if anything might weaken the curse if her character was too far fetched for their memories.

"I know you don't" Was the only response she got, along with a smirk as Snow disappeared inside the bathroom only to emerge a few minutes later, freshly showered and changed.

The third time she was using the facilities now with a swirl of thoughts in her head, Regina let the novelty of such devices pass her as she washed and changed, fumbling with the toothbrush for a few seconds before even that too was mastered.

"What do you mean you know I don't like to cuddle?" Was the first thing out of her mouth when she approached the bed, her apprehension gone as she slid inside the covers, patting down the pillows to her liking before turning to face Snow.

"You claim not to like it, but you've never protested when we actually do. I think you just get hot in the night, otherwise when it's really cold…" Trailing off with a pointed look towards the older brunette, Snow was rewarded with a scoff and flicker of the light before that was switched off, plunging them into darkness. Sleep came almost instantly then, the day tiring, and the knowledge that Emma would soon cry for milk having them both drift off easily.

* * *

It must have been a few hours later when Regina woke with a start, a heavy weight on her chest and a brewing panic that festered from the fear of unfamiliar surroundings.

"Don't get up" She heard from somewhere above her as the weight moved off her, crossed the room and disappeared down the hallway to sooth the cries of an infant she forgot she had. Gods, did she slide into bed with Snow White? Did she do so _willingly?_ What the hell was happening to her?

Throwing the warm covers off her, Regina nearly ran out of the room that smelt like Snow. A room that was warm like her, that felt soft, and like a missing piece of the puzzle that had lulled her to a sleep better than any potion could muster.

It was the memories; nothing could fight them, and nothing could win against the curse that had promised misery. She had thought going with the flow to be a good bet, but then that didn't sit well with her morals, not to mention she was a complete love sick fool in all her memories, nothing to which she resembled now, and then… the slight changes looked as if they had been forgotten and reset to the beginning of the day again.

Rubbing her hands down her face to rid herself of the sleep that still clung to her lashes, Regina followed the sound of soft humming and peered inside the nursery where Emma drank from her mother quietly, a soft tune calming her down to a state of sleepiness so that she detached without a fuss and burped effortlessly.

The sight warmed her heart, had her lean against the doorframe just like the woman in her memories, the one with long flowing hair and soft eyes that had craved this life. Regina almost felt guilty for taking away such a gift from the cursed version of herself, but the settled life was never for her, at least not with _Snow._

"I thought I told you not to wake up? I have this… go back to bed" Setting Emma down in her crib, Snow approached Regina carefully, her voice a mere whisper while she intertwined her fingers within her wife's.

"I can't do this" Regina whispered back "I can't lie to myself and say I'm happy when this place…" She sighed, looking up to the ceiling, her voice a mere whisper to the stars hidden from her view "I don't know what I want anymore" The curse was supposed to make her happy, provide her victory, but instead she got a handful of pain instead, and now she had these cursed memories where she most certainly felt happy, but in order to be in that state permanently, well… Regina wasn't going to give up her old memories for the new ones.

"I'm sorry" Ripping her hand from Snow's, the mayor stepped back a few paces, mind whirring with the thoughts on how the curse would take her new decision "I want a divorce"


	10. Wrong Decisions

**Chapter 9: Wrong decisions**

 

It had been a week since Regina dropped a bombshell like that on Snow, the brunette moving out from a room she never even considered hers in the first place to the guest room down the hall. Even if she had left the threat hanging in the air, Regina had yet to approach Gold for the corresponding paperwork, and the problem was that the new mayor had no idea why she was stalling.

First it had been because she was unwell to think about such long processes, and then at the end of the week it had been because there was that appointment with Whale. Through silent glares and otherwise dry humour on Whale's part, the process had been almost painful and Regina was declared fit enough to stumble her way through her mayoral duties.

There was of course, the ever persistent tug of purple fog that threatened its return every time she held Emma, or spoke to Snow about something mundane, but her instinct to kick and boot anything that dare provide her a reprieve from her long lived sadness was what kept her relatively sane.

When Monday rolled around, the brunette having received enough cold shoulder to last a lifetime after numerous apologies that were not needed, Regina found herself in her office, one designed to her tastes and more comfortable than her own home.

It took less than she expected to learn the ropes, the curse providing her with the basic knowledge of how to interpret policy, but the awe and wonderment she usually tampered down was brought to the surface as she glided a pen across the thinner than usual parchment, the instrument of such fine writing not even needing to be dipped in ink!

Papers were read, things were signed off and ends of pages were stamped, and when lunch rolled around Regina was still fascinated by something as basic as the wheels at the bottom of her chair that she skipped it altogether. Only when the sun began to dip below the horizon and her stomach growled did she pack whatever possessions she had and walked back to the mansion, her steps steady and slow.

Despite her initial fear toward the fog, the idea that it's magic described in the little scroll would be her undoing only fuelling her apprehension toward it, Regina had taken to try and control the magic, siphon it into something other than fake memories—but to no avail. The silent walk back home, a place she associated now in her head with the brat that stole her life, Regina breathed in through her nose and out through her mouth, focusing on the magic as she had done in her empty bedroom devoid of any personality and let it wash over her as some sort of sick and twisted punishment to feel what could have been.

" _Does it hurt?' Mary Margaret asked, her fingers intertwined with Regina's as they walked, her soft voice breaking the silence they had agreed upon when the older brunette's jaw only stiffened at any attempt of conversation._

" _No" Regina bit out, her voice as hard as stone, nothing seemingly able to chip away at the stubborn anger that surrounded her._

_Mary Margaret only leaned against Regina's side, her cheek pressed into her companion's shoulder and her soft breaths the only thing to break the stifling silence that descended the couple once more._

The fog was pulled back with force, the memory leaving behind a pain in her hand she felt as if it had been real, as if her knuckles were bruising purple after punching a man who called her then new wife a rather derogatory term when he noticed she was married to a woman and not interested in his drunken attempts at flirtation.

The sad part about the entire ordeal was the fact that Regina, a woman once called the Evil Queen, longed to feel Mary Margaret's hand in hers, the cool skin soothing against the bruise that had been earned with a spiteful anger and impulsiveness she possessed outside the curse as well. Perhaps the cursed Regina and Evil Queen weren't so different after all, only one of them was decidedly more human than the other.

It was dangerous, what she was doing with this experimentation, but the yearning for something like this, a family she could never fully integrate herself into could only be accessed through the secret of the magic that tortured her every day. Gods, what she would give to just be able to forget everything without the filthy feeling she had crawling up her skin at the mere thought of giving up. She had come here for her revenge, brought everyone along with her to see them suffer, to watch as their souls became just as numb as hers had, but all she possessed in the quaint town now was a misery that she couldn't seem to run from no matter the control she possessed on the matter.

It would be easy to run away, to go to a new town and leave the cursed denizens of the enchanted forest forever stumbling through a haze of submission to no one in particular. Although, Regina stayed in the same house as Snow White, cradled a child to her chest as if the babe in her arms was the most precious thing in the town, and now toying with a hundred of different ideas as to the way she could live out the rest of eternity.

"Where are you taking her?!"

Snow jumped at the sound of Regina's voice, the naïve version of her nemesis looking at her wife with wide eyes, Emma clutched to her chest with a bag in her hand that looked too large to carry to the store for a quick run.

"Regina" Mary Margaret breathed, a guilty look on her face, her eyes darting down to the duffle bag that was set next to her feet gently. She was acting as if Regina were a wild animal, one that needed to be calmed down no matter her own anger toward the woman who had done a complete one eighty within the last two weeks.

"No, no you don't get to leave me" The evenness to which she spoke should have startled Snow, but all her words served to do was make the younger brunette glare at Regina with such determination that the mayor took a few steps back in alarm. Hadn't she cursed her nemesis to be meek, to follow her every command without thought for fighting back? But then again, what  _had_  been going Regina's way since she had sacrificed her father's soul for a prison of her own suffering?

" _I_  don't get to leave  _you?_ " Mary Margaret hissed, clutching Emma closer to her chest, the child's hand poking out momentarily before grabbing something within her knitted blanket, "You asked me for a divorce a week ago for no reason whatsoever, and you expect me to be answerable to you?!" She was hurting, Regina could see as much, could register the way she was lashing out in comparison to her own experiences, but the Evil Queen wasn't known for pulling punches, and this time was no different.

"I wanted a divorce from  _you_ , you—" Regina's lips curled into a sneer, cutting off the hateful words that delved too deep within the secret of the curse she was living, "You don't get to take my Daughter away from Me!". Her teeth was bared, index finger pointing accusatory at the other woman who dare take the only thing that had given her joy in this curse away.

" _Your daughter?!"_  Mary Margaret screeched, her face twisting in disgust, "Emma is  **mine** , and you're never getting your hands on her ever again!" Mary Margaret wasn't Mary Margaret in that moment, and if Regina weren't so damn wound up she would have noticed the sparks of purple flashing in her cursed wife's eyes, a warning she should've heeded.

"Emma is Mine!" Stomping over with a familiar rage, Regina reached out and grabbed at Emma, the fragile infant beginning to wail under the rough treatment of being pulled by two mothers who ought to love each other.

"Leave my daughter alone you evil witch!" Pushing Regina back with a strength only Snow White possessed, the mayor stumbled back shocked, her ears registering the words to turn her blood cold. It couldn't be. The curse was destined to last twenty eight years and she wasn't ready to hand it over before she got to properly figure out how to be happy within it.

"No…. no give me the child, Snow" Her arms were outstretched, her handbag slipping off her shoulder to clatter to the floor next to the duffle bag she walked over trying to follow the other woman's steps. Snow for her part kept moving backwards, fear on her face that made Regina's heart clench in ways that she was sure was impossible after Daniel's death.

"I gave you so many chances, you took  _everything_  from me" Words that started off strong ended in a pathetic whisper, the only thing Snow giving away about her mental turmoil the way her voice cracked, the sheen in her eyes rimmed around sparks of purple that continued to grow steady in its light. She was in attack mode, trying to find an exit without startling Regina to react violently and hurt Emma, the child who would break the curse, one she would get to raise with Charming once she woke him from his coma.

"Give me the child . " Regina was insistent, knowing that if Snow got away she would lead a mob to her front door, behead her for her curse and then hope to be sent back where she would lie next to the shepherd and pretend the child she birthed was loved more than the one she held to her chest now. That was the one thing she had that David didn't—Snow's unconditional adoration, and with Emma in her arms, maybe the death that would come would be bearable.

They had stumbled into the house by the time Snow vehemently shook her head no, Regina trying to access whatever magic she could only to find it useless even to recall a fake memory and grab the child before Snow ran to her Prince. She got close enough just once, her fingertips brushing her nemesis' shoulder before a vase shattered over the left side of her head.

She could feel a trickle of blood, the familiar tug of the curse fog soothing her as she fell down, her eyes providing a black and colour flash of Snow running out of the house with a wailing Emma in her arms.

(x)(x)(x)

A groan was the first thing that slipped from Regina's lips when she attempted to open her eyes, her fingers touching the side of her head to come away with blood she blinked blearily at.

"Rough day, Dearie?" Her head snapped to the side, an obnoxious sight of a man leaning heavily on his cane with the smuggest smirk possible assaulting her vision.

"What do you want?" The brunette spat, attempting to pull herself up but only managing to pathetically lean against the foyer wall where she fell, the white of the walls now staining red.

"To inform your majesty of a brewing storm—or rather a horde of people headed this way out for your blood" The sinister way in which Gold said those words had Regina shudder. So the curse really was broken then? Did he come here to gloat?

"Did you come here to watch? Get off on it?" Her smile was pained, but Rumple got the message well enough, the insult wrapped into something almost inappropriately playful for the grave situation they had found themselves in.

"Now now, your majesty" He chided, his voice taking on a slight giggle he looked to be visibly tampering down, "We both want the same thing, so I suggest you fix it before your head rolls"

Swallowing away the fear that had built up in her throat over the numerous things happening all at once, Regina clenched her jaw and pushed herself further up, trying to seem strong despite the sharp pain in her head and the burning in her heart that felt too much like something was breaking in there. "You want the curse intact?" She inquired, one eyebrow raised, "How am I supposed to cast it again when it's been Broken?!"

Rumple only glared at her outburst, his lips twisting into a sneer that was brought down too close to comfort, his breath ghosting her cheek when he spoke directly into her ear, "It hasn't been broken, simply… weakened. Once you stop fighting your curse, dearie, the better off we'll all be"

There was something he wasn't telling her, a missing piece of the puzzle that had her frown after his retreating figure. There was a glimmer of purple in his eyes too, the same one in Snow's before she ran off, a fog lifting from their minds much in the same way Regina had tried to live out the rest of her days too. Was it possible that the caster could fight off the fog of not only their own minds but everyone else's too? Perhaps the curse had simply thought her ungrateful and decided to retract everything she had ever worked hard for because it had developed  _feelings_.

Gritting her teeth against the dizziness that took over her when she finally pushed herself up to stand, Regina grabbed onto the doorframe and stepped outside to the darkened driveway, stars twinkling above with no care as to her plight. She was alone, no matter what she did to try and rectify that—but cursed Regina had a wife and child, she was happy beyond reason with the simplicity of loving the evil queen's mortal enemy, a woman who had stolen her first love from her. How could she accept loving Snow the same way she would have Daniel?

Swallowing the growing lump in her throat, Regina decided that there was one thing this cursed Regina and the evil Queen had in common: A love for Emma. And right now, her daughter was priority. She had to get Emma back before Snow attempted to raise her child with a comatose shepherd.


	11. Reverse Curse

CHAPTER 10: REVERSE CURSE

 

At first the town looked its normal dull self. A quiet evening supposedly spent doing whatever they were cursed to do, but once Regina drove along the main road toward the hospital, that was where everything looked as if it were burning in hell.

 

The sight of her Mercedes had people turn and look in disgust, their eyes a purple hue and sparking with magic she didn’t even know existed so openly in this realm. Something was definitely wrong, and Regina was sure it wasn’t because of the hit she took to her head.

 

Looking up, a flash of lightning catching her attention, Regina saw a cloud of purple looming overhead, her car crawling by toward the hospital where a burst of purple seemed to rush toward her at full force. Slamming on the brakes, the air sucked from her lungs, Regina heaved with the emotion that was whipped to the surface.

 

Two weeks had gone by and Regina hadn’t bothered to think about more than herself and the curse that held her here. She hadn’t stopped to think about the consequences of standing between acceptance and rejection of what she desperately needed, and what she thought she wanted. Was this her punishment then, to realise after all this time that she could have been happy? Maybe her mother was wrong in pushing her toward Leopold, maybe she should have waited a few years and then…

 

Slamming on the gas, Regina drove without any fear, knowing that if she wanted answers, real ones, then she wasn’t going to get it sitting here in a car that wouldn’t protect her. She had a child to think about now, a curse that was unravelling at the seams, and a woman she could have been happy with had she relinquished control over her hatred.

 

XXX

 

“Snow,” She called, stumbling through the hallways of the hospital which was deserted except for a gathering around the ICU. Regina almost convinced herself that it was for something else, that the pointed blade aimed at her throat was nothing more than the figment of her imagination, but standing before her very wide awake was none other than Prince Charming himself. It was noble of him to shield Snow and the child, even if the purple hue in his eyes was distracting enough.

 

“Snow, please, just give me the child.” The cool metal of the blade sat closer to her skin, the threat real enough for her to swallow thickly.

 

“You’re not getting anywhere near our daughter,” David said angrily, his face red and scrunched up from trying to hold back tears. She knew his thoughts, knew the ‘ _what ifs?’_ that were running through his head at only two weeks having gone by in a curse destined to take twenty eight years. Regina herself was having trouble understanding it all, but if she was the only one without purple in her eyes, then the problem had to be her.

 

“She’s **mine.** ” Stubbornly, her skin prickling at the feeling of the sharp blade slicing into her skin, Regina stepped closer, determined to take Emma far away from this all if that was it took to be happy at last.

 

“She broke the curse,” Snow said from behind David, stepping forward to meet Regina’s eyes. “You lost.” And it was there that Regina saw it, the way her daughter seemed to blink at her knowingly, how her lips would twitch up into a smile; Emma was growing right before her eyes and she hadn’t even known.

 

“ _No_ ,” she said softly, “you put her in the wardrobe, she was _gone_.”

 

“And she came back to save us from _you_.” Shoved with the force of David’s sword, Regina fell back on her hands, the crowd around her looking at her with hungry gazes that lusted after the justice they shouldn’t be getting. How could she be so stupid? How could she have missed such a crucial ingredient all because of _affection?_ If Regina had any magic, she would have ripped out her own heart as punishment.

 

There was only one way out now, and as the fog entered her mind, Regina didn’t fight it, not when she was powerless against the mob that was salivating at beheading her, not with Snow standing over her victorious with a child she cared for wrapped up in an embrace with a man that didn’t deserve more than a coma.

 

“Kill her!” Someone shouted, and Regina heard the slice of David’s blade through the air before she fully let go. Memories filled her head, cramming inside her mind to push the Evil Queen out with the curse’s signature fog. She was changing, and Regina wasn’t sure if she would be able to fix the curse in time, not when it felt like an eternity until the pounding between her eyes subsided.

 

“Mary Margaret?” She gasped out, looking at her wife with fear in her eyes, the sword pausing at her throat where a line of blood dotted fair skin.

 

For a moment, one victorious moment, Regina saw Mary Margaret’s eyes return to its normal green, her fingers splaying over John Doe’s arm to push him aside, the sword in his hand clattering to the floor where it lay useless. This was the woman she remembered, and Regina smiled widely up her without any fear despite her unusual position on the ground.

 

“David,” Mary Margaret rasped, her eyes darting along the Evil Queen’s body to try and suss out whether this was all a trick or not. “We can’t kill her,” she said instead, stubborn in believing Regina lying, “we should lock her up and have a fair trial.” And that was where Regina’s smile dropped, the cool blade of something like disappointment sliding across her skin in ways that hurt more than the wound on her neck. She felt it, the _thunk_ of helplessness that had her want to lash out at someone, at something, but the love she felt for the child who gurgled at her made her stop. Emma’s first memory of Regina shouldn’t be that resembling a wild animal. She was mayor for crying out loud! Regina would handle this with dignity.

 

“A trial for what?” Regina yelled, tears gathering at the corner of her eyes—or as much dignity as she could muster. “Mary Margaret, please, I don’t know what’s going on. We should go home, it isn’t safe for Emma.” Staggering up to her feet, wincing at the pain in her head and now at her throat, Regina reached for Emma, the child laughing in response to her mother but making no move to do anything more.

 

Snow stepped back, David standing between them as a shield, and it was then that Regina understood. “You’re upset,” she said softly, “I know… I know I was acting strange, but I was _scared._ I don’t know how to be a mother, I didn’t know how to be a good wife after everything. I’m ready to go to counselling if that’s what it takes—I can change, I can _try_. I don’t want a divorce,” she cried, tears cascading down her cheeks in regret and pain, “I _love_ you.”

 

There was no way Regina would have ever said that to Snow under any circumstances, and the fact that Regina seemed to now pull out that card was unrealistic. The woman Snow knew would rather fight until her last breath than accept defeat like this—there was something else at play here.

 

“Lock her up! She’ll say anything to save herself!” David yelled, and Emma cried against Snow’s chest at the sudden sound. Rocking the child, David’s large hand affectionately apologising for the sudden burst of emotion, Emma finally quietened. This was her family, not Regina, not even the woman with a cursed persona who believed herself to be Emma’s mother.

 

XXX

 

“Let me out of here!” Regina shook the bars to the cell, the metal gate rattling but not giving way. Pillows and blankets were hurled at the cell bars but nothing worked, of course it didn’t. “I did nothing, nothing!” This was injustice, and she was burning from the inside out with a jealous rage. How dare her wife stand by that man and act like their relationship was _nothing?_ They had a child together, history that no one could erase, and now as soon as a John Doe woke up from a coma, Mary Margaret was all set on him? No, there had to be another reason, she just needed to get out of this cell.

 

“You’re only going to hurt yourself.” Mary Margaret stood in the doorway of the police station, her body language stiffer, her clothes better fitted to someone constantly moving. She looked gorgeous.

 

“Get me out, Mary Margaret please, I didn’t do anything.” Surely her wife would understand, would see the injustice of this imprisonment for nothing more than asking for a divorce.

 

“Stop this act, Regina. It’s too late to pretend to be cursed now.” For some reason, whether the conviction of her words or the stance Mary Margaret took, Regina could see that this world her wife had constructed seemed to be entirely real to her, and in this, Regina was the villain. Whatever way she tried to escape now would have to be in trying to get Mary Margaret to see the truth, and memory would be the best way forward.

 

“Do you remember,” Regina began, reaching through the bars to grasp onto Mary Margaret’s sweater when she came close enough, “do you remember the first time you told me you loved me?” The recognition in Mary Margaret’s eyes was enough for Regina to continue, a small smile blooming on wet lips. “It was about to rain, and we walking on opposite ends of the pond…” pulling Mary Margaret closer, Regina lowered her voice to a whisper, her gaze dropping to her wife’s lips in desire that hadn’t been there in the last two weeks. “I still have that paper boat you floated over to me,” she husked, her fingers threading through Mary Margaret’s hair in order to tug her closer, their lips meeting through the bars of the cell.

 

Snow kissed Regina back, a metal bar pressing into her cheek but she couldn’t care less. A part of her, the cursed half, recognised this memory, knew the love Regina had for her as well as the desire that seemed ever burning. As much as she wanted to fight against her instincts, Snow couldn’t deny the fact that Mary Margaret lived inside her too.

 

Snapping her eyes open and pushing Regina away, Snow wiped her mouth with wide eyes. She had a husband, a child that she could call rightfully hers, and now she wanted Regina too? For all she knew, Regina could be faking this entire thing. This woman cast the curse in the first place, surely she must have some sort of failsafe built in to keep her alive.

 

“Stay away from me,” Snow growled out, running until she was out of station and couldn’t hear the pleas of Regina again. What she needed was a good night’s sleep and then they could all deal with this in the morning—only strange things had started to happen, and before she could recognise the fact that Regina’s eyes shone purple, Snow’s head filled with a similar colour fog, a memory from her cursed persona having her clutch onto the wall for support and cry out in agony.

 

_“I love you.” The paper boat unfolded to say, and Regina’s responding smile burned into Snow’s brain._

 

XXX

 

“It didn’t work,” a voice said through the darkness, his hands squeezing the head of his cane tighter. “I thought it would work.”

 

“Gold?” Regina asked, getting up from her perch on the hard bunk to grasp onto the bars of the cell instead, “What are you doing here?”

 

“Your eyes,” he continued, not interested in answering trivial questions, “they are purple.” When Gold stepped into the light, his brown eyes beady and searching, Regina flinched at the cold touch of his hand to her cheek. “I thought it would work, but it seems the child is the key, not the caster.”

 

“I don’t understand,” Regina grit out, shifting away from Gold’s touch, “everything doesn’t make sense. Mary Margaret was talking about a curse and you’re—you’re sounding just like her!”

 

Silence from her visitor had Regina impatient, and as much as she wanted to reach through the bars of her cell and shake the man, her wait was rewarded when a key was pressed into her palm. “I suggest you find a place to hide, Madame Mayor, just until you get your memories back.” The cool metal of the key burned into her palm, but she made no move to look at it, not with the glint in Gold’s eye that scared her enough to step back into the shadows, watching until he hobbled away and out of sight.

 

“I’ll go only after I get Emma,” Regina whispered into the night, her words nothing less than a conviction when she turned the skeleton key to gain her freedom and walked out into the inky darkness.

 


	12. Secret Meetings

Chapter 11: Secret Meetings

 

Emma White, princess to Misthaven, was every mother’s dream. In the curse she had been hospitalised for a week, the timeline shifting to accommodate a child that wasn’t written in, but now Snow knew who this baby was, where she came from, and the incredible things she could do—she also knew that for two weeks she had been living in this very room as _Regina’s_ wife, not David’s.

 

“She’s fine, Snow,” David said from beside her, his muscled chest providing a cushion for her head to rest on. Snow wasn’t particularly worried about Emma, more about the cursed mother who was desperate enough to try and play her the fool, and about the purple fog that entered her brain and gave her memories of something she had thought completely gone. How was she to live the lives of two people, loving two people… at least she was the mother to one, and that she could handle. Emma was all she needed until she could figure out how to get rid of this curse.

 

“David,” she breathed, unsteady with her thoughts, her hand running down his chest until the images she had of this bed with Regina in it faded with the way David touched her. She had missed this, Snow convinced herself, and she had missed her husband who loved her in far less painful ways than Regina.

 

XXX

 

Regina’s heels were caked in mud, dried blood clung to the skin on her neck, and her head felt as if there were still pieces of glass stuck in it. She didn’t know how she had gotten that wound, but her hair was matted enough for her to know that after getting Emma, her next stop should be the hospital.

 

Laying in wait across the road, her large white mansion coming into view, Regina watched from the shadows at the way John Doe took over her life, how he stripped himself and got into her bed, how he… how he _touched_ her wife.

 

No. The plan was to get Emma and run—if Mary Margaret didn’t love her anymore, if she was angry because Regina had been acting strangely since she gave birth, then it was her loss.

 

The light in the master bedroom went off, and although Regina could see moving shapes behind the curtain, there would be no better time. Sex consumed someone, made them hyper aware to the other person, and if Mary Margaret loved this John Doe as much as Regina thought she did, then it wouldn’t be a problem to slip in and grab the child she had wanted from day one.

 

There was no escape plan, no thought for what to do next, and besides the urge to keep her daughter safe, Regina didn’t have any other excuses. At least here, breaking into her own home with the spare key kept on the windowsill, Regina felt a sense of righteousness by taking Emma away from barbaric grunting and that fake moan Mary Margaret had tried to use on her once. The house looked different in the dark, glass pieces swept aside by the front door, fallen photo frames and blood streaked down the wall. Instinctively, Regina reached up to touch her head and shuddered at the tug of _something_ just under the surface.

 

Emma was here, Emma needed to be taken somewhere safe, and away from these maniacs ranting on about curses and punishments like they were some higher power and Regina was stuck in a nightmare she couldn’t wake up from no matter what.

 

Removing her muddy shoes, Regina set them down on the linoleum and made her way upstairs, her hand gripping the railing with a knuckle-white grip to keep herself from hurling the empty contents of her stomach down on the floor the closer she got to hearing her cheating wife reach orgasm. She didn’t have a lot of time then, and if she wanted to kidnap her own daughter she had to do it before Mary Margaret reached her peak. She had no doubt John Doe would fall asleep right after, but Mary Margaret would lie awake, she would demand another round, and if she didn’t get one… she would seek out Emma.

 

Moving quickly, fast enough that she saw the open door to the nursery, Regina pushed herself inside and breathed a sigh of relief when she saw Emma in her crib. The child was gorgeous, she looked every bit of Mary Margaret and the bits that were not her were… Emma looked nothing like Regina, did she? She looked like John Doe who now felt he had rights to sleep in Regina’s bed and touch her wife, to parent her child and, what then? Become mayor?

 

She was so close, she could reach out, take Emma, and run like crazy, but the sight of an innocent in all of this had Regina drop her face into her hands. She couldn’t do this, she couldn’t ignore the cut on her neck or the wound on her head, and she couldn’t push aside how stupid she had been all because she had been _scared_. Regina couldn’t even remember why she was scared, only that she felt everything happening to her now was an apt punishment, something she deserved, and Regina had never done a bad thing in her life, so why—

 

“Step away from my daughter!” The low timbre of Snow’s voice had Regina look up in alarm, tears streaming down her face and her hands dirtied with mud and blood. She looked a mess, one that had lost everything and yet nothing at all.

 

“Let me take her away, you can—you can have your man toy and my house, you can have my job, but I won’t let you take away my daughter.” She may have looked a mess, but the snarl on her mouth was telling enough as to how much she had heard, and how little she cared.

 

“He’s my **husband** ,” Snow answered, stepping forward into the room, her skin still sweaty from where the robe refused to cover.

 

“ _I’m_ your wife, he’s nothing more than some fantasy!” Stepping toward Mary Margaret, Regina let her emotions show, the hurt, the betrayal, that fact that only a day after asking for a divorce, Mary Margaret had moved on so seamlessly as if she had never loved Regina in the first place. This was obscene, and Emma didn’t have to be in the next room listening in on things she didn’t understand as yet.

 

“You can’t have Emma,” Snow insisted, her arms crossed over her torso and her eyes looking over Regina with some kind of reverence that neither had the time to decipher, “you can’t have me, you can’t have anything other than a trial that I’ve been so kind as to offer you—the last one,” she scoffed, “the last one you… you ruined too.”

 

“Last one?” Regina asked, her expression aghast, “I had no trial,” and here Snow looked as if she had known all along that Regina was faking, but Regina stepped forward again, her shadow falling across Mary Margaret’s face, “I was a girl in a graveyard who came to your rescue, and then I fell in love with you, I married you, I gave you a child, and now… after you’ve taken everything from me, this is what you have to offer? _A trial?_ I don’t need a trial, I need my life back!”

 

Emma kicked out her blanket at the rise in Regina’s voice, both women turning toward her with wide eyes until she settled again. Snow looked at Emma for a beat longer, her arms uncrossing and her eyes closing for a second. Regina would have snapped her neck by now, she would have taken a knife from the kitchen and slashed Charming’s wrists, stolen Emma and ran away but… but she was here, dressed in yesterday’s clothes and standing despite everything, bargaining, pleading, begging.

 

“Go take a shower, we’ll talk in the morning.”

 

“How do I know you won’t let your boyfriend behead me in the morning?”

 

“How do I know you won’t take Emma and run before you switch off the water?”

 

Standing still, facing each other, Regina and Snow looked like two different people from what they both remembered, one cursed and other cursed in an entirely different way. Snow wanted Regina to stay, after all they were still family, and a fair trial was what she deserved. Regina on the other hand looked at Mary Margaret as if she wasn’t her wife at all, simply some pig headed criminal that wanted something from her that she couldn’t give.

 

“I want him gone,” Regina negotiated, “that’s my bed, you are _my_ wife—”

 

“He is my husband.” The finality to which it was said had Regina see red, her instincts, one buried deep had her slam Mary Margaret against the wall, her hand around her wife’s throat and her lips too close. “Mine,” she growled, her grip loosening, her eyes becoming soft again, “mine.”

 

Snow watched Regina in the dark, the fear she usually felt when going up against the evil queen dropping away when she glimpsed at the broken woman beneath. Regina might have come for Emma, but the Evil Queen wanted Snow, she needed Snow in ways that neither of them could really comprehend. Without Snow, did the Evil Queen really even exist?

 

“Go take a shower, and when you’re clean, and there isn’t blood on your clothes, we can talk.” If Snow stroked Regina’s cheek lovingly, if she let her thumb glide over Regina’s lower lip before she let Regina press a desperate kiss to her lips, then she would blame it all on the curse that hadn’t quite done anything since that time outside the sheriff’s station.

 

Regina pushed back, leaving Mary Margaret leaning against the wall, and physically restrained herself from going into her bedroom and strangling the man who slept there. _Not today_ , she promised herself, today she would shower, today she would be with her daughter and show her wife that she was wrong about everything.

 

XXX

 

Apple cider was handed to Regina, the dim light from the side lamp the only light in the house. Snow had refused for Regina to hold Emma, not tonight at least, and instead, they found themselves in Regina’s office where once Mary Margaret had asked if Regina was having an affair—how the tables had turned.

 

“Do you want to dry your hair?” Snow asked, looking over at Regina whose hair was slicked back, droplets of water falling down onto the silk collar of her pyjamas. The least Snow could do was wrestle out some clothes from the master bedroom, hand them to Regina with a fresh towel and try not to look at this situation as anything more than helping the woman who once saved her life.

 

“Wouldn’t the sound of a hairdryer wake your boyfriend up?” Snow wanted to correct Regina again, yell it from the rooftops that David was her _husband_ , but how many times must she try and fail? Regina would never budge, and Snow would be beating against a brick wall. This wasn’t her Evil Queen, but the cursed persona of a woman who was damaged, who needed Mary Margaret to ground and stabilise her—she was the Evil Queen’s cursed Daniel.

“You really just want Emma, don’t you?” Regina’s head picked up at Mary Margaret’s words, the apple cider finally lifted to her lips where she took a large gulp.

 

“Why do you say that?” She inquired, tired beyond exhausted and aching in places where the water had touched. There had been glass in her hair and mud between her toes, blood between her shoulder blades and scrapes along her palms that she couldn’t remember how she had gotten—and that was only the outside, what about the bruises along her heart and her bleeding soul? Mother was right about the Blanchard family, she should have never married into them.

 

“The last time you thought I was cheating you put up a legendary fuss… I have another man sleeping in our bed and you…” downing her apple cider, Snow wiped away tears that had gathered at the corner of her eyes and stood to refill her glass. The realisation that perhaps she could have had Regina if she only wanted her stung hard enough. Did she want Regina? Did she want a life with the Evil Queen or this cursed Madame Mayor? Was she ready to give up David for that? “You should get your memories back.”

 

“You and all this curse nonsense,” Regina rasped, taking another sip of her drink, licking along her lower lip to catch the droplets.

 

“If you had your memories back you would stop fighting so hard. Emma isn’t yours, I am not yours—you would stop fighting, and kill me probably.” Taking a deep breath, the adrenaline she used to get from going toe to toe with Regina all but gone, Snow found that she missed it terribly. Between the two of them, at least she was the one who came to terms with her feelings far quicker than Regina’s prolonged refusal for anything other revenge.

 

Turning to face Regina, catching the look of pure agony on her face, Snow watched as her once arch nemesis struggled to keep her emotions to herself. “Everything I have ever had has been taken away from me, what do I fight for now? Emma isn’t mine, you are not mine, this house isn’t mine… my job isn’t mine, not anymore I think, and this town wants my head on a pike. I am one person, who doesn’t understand anything, and I’m fighting for this patch of grass that isn’t even my grass at all.” A choking sob left Regina’s throat, one covered with the last sip of cider before the glass was left aside.

 

“Maybe, if I run now and never look back, someone else out there will love me more than I loved you.”

 

Snow’s untouched refill of cider was set aside, her green eyes watching as Regina stood on shaky legs, defeat lining her features so intricately, Snow wasn’t sure what to do with herself now that this permission was given for her to be happy. She remembered the time after her wedding to David where she had gone after Medusa, a tool she had said, one to defeat Regina. Regina was all she thought about, all she needed to find a solution to her problem, to find the drive within her that fuelled everything, and now her worst enemy and best inspiration was just going to leave, find someone else to love when that was all Snow wanted for eternity?

 

“ **No**.”

 

“Excuse me?” Regina asked, turning to regard Mary Margaret again.

 

“I said No. You are _mine_.”

 

Regina swallowed thickly, the possession in Mary Margaret’s voice enough for her resolve to quiver just a little. This was the woman she married, the one who would fight tooth and nail for her, for them. “What do you want me to do, Mary Margaret? Be the third wheel to you and Mr Doe? Look at Emma and wish that you would give me half of the rights you give him? I won’t torture myself.”

 

“What if you didn’t have to?’ And here was where Snow was out of her mind. She loved David, she loved him so much, but he was… he was a good prince who respected her, who saw her as a woman and loved her truly. They had broken a curse together once before, and that love was _safe_ , it was stable—he wasn’t her stepmother, a woman with whom she had begged father to bring into their castle. That sort of love, the one where your heart grows twice its size and you feel as if you cannot take another breath? That was all Regina.

 

“I need time, Regina. Just give me time and we can figure everything out. You need your memories back, you need—you need to remember before I leave everything for you.” The scary part was that Snow would leave everything behind for Regina, she was a masochist after all.

 

Regina looked to Mary Margaret, her fingers running through her wet hair as she weighed her options. Could she wait, could she forgive Mary Margaret for this? “I’ll go to Gold, you have one week, and if you don’t—I want him _gone_ , Mary Margaret, I want him gone.” Nodding her head, Snow watched as Regina ascended the stairs on shaky legs, the house dark and quiet except for the rustling of what Snow assumed to be a bag and clothes slipping out from their hangers.

 

She drank whilst Regina packed, the decanter of cider losing its golden liquid the longer she stood there, the longer she waited for the woman she didn’t want to love to leave. She would be punished for choosing her enemy over her ally, but at least this way, if Regina became the Evil Queen again, Snow would have a few days to get her life in order.

 

“One week,” Regina echoed from the doorway, a gym bag in hand, “I won’t wait longer than that.” She looked as if she had been crying, her pyjamas gone and replaced with a pantsuit, heels dangling from her fingers before she bent at the waist to slip them on. Snow watched intently, her eyes following her nemesis as she strutted out of the house leaving everything behind with only a week to fix this mess before it consumed them both whole.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it is taking me a long time to update, but I just want to say thank you to everyone who is still reading this, and I hope to finish this story off soon now with Once officially over.


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